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Yoda has scored again!! Yoda’s “model” daughter, Alana, got another job **cough, cough** all **cough, cough** by **cough, cough** herself… as the face of Maybelline. Alana actually tried a Maybelline product once when she accidentally visited a drug store that … Continue reading
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This is the first in a series of a brand new category: “The Most Excrutiatingly Difficult Questions About The Housewives”! QUESTION: Which of these BeverlyHills Housewives is married to… HARRY HAMLIN!?!?! HARRY HAMLIN!! OMG… She’s married to HARRY HAMLIN!! Even … Continue reading
The biggest snooze-inducing segment of the “problem with kids” and “kids take off” episode of the RHOBH was Jello’s love note to her mommy. What a crock! We’ll bet that Yoda dictated that note while she was laid up with her LimeyLymes. Although disease-afflicted every day during filming except for one, Yoda managed to arranged Jello’s new “student” apartment. Jello escaped to New York to attend photography school at Parsons and is living in a CPW apartment which the majority of students attending NYC schools could never afford… even if they get a job after they get their degree.
NOTE: How many times was HagfaceKyle’s kid, FrontPorcha, highlighted during the episode?
SchzoidYoda gets a reprieve from her LymeYoda “stick an IV in me and take a picture” personality and HelicopterYoda escorts Jello to her very first apartment on CPW. It’s amazing that Yoda didn’t further escort Jello to her very first class at Parsons. DrunkOtis blabs more about her contentious divorce and child support issues. AND…one of the Housewives is married to… HarryHamlin!! Yes…HARRY HAMLIN!!!
Carole Schaffer, Associate Dean at Parsons School of Design said that she looks for “discipline, drive and seriousness about the hard-work involved in becoming a designer.” Watch for Jello to drop out quickly and concentrate on her mother-made “modeling” career… if she was actually matriculated at Parsons in the first place!! Perhaps Yoda has her sights on shopping a new “reality” show… “Two ‘Models’ In New York…Better Than The Kartrashians!”
“Jello is still dealing with the shame of getting a DUI”
No, YodaHead… Jello is NOT dealing with the shame. YOU are.
Jello is no more model material than CrooksAyers; but, Yoda is dead set on forcing her kid to follow the path of her older non-model sister, Alana. Jello is now ready to be formed by her nervous mother… into whatever her mother wants her to be! Yoda is holding Jello’s “bad mistake” over her head and because she’s under age at 17-years-old, she is tightly under Yoda’s thumb and must obey!
Yoda is so extreme in this preview that she holds Jello while walking her to the photo shoot with BeverlyHillsMagazine… which OCLydia must have sold to this guy to sell mattresses.
Yoda also explains how her strict punishment has affected Jello. Jello is REALLY feeling the wrath of Yoda after she took her phone away for 21 DAYS!! And, the REALLY painful punishment doled out to Jello? Jello has to pay her attorney… from her SAVINGS!! OUCH!
The second segment of this RHOBH preview is more of the DrunkOtis/PumpMyStomach sit down.
Yoda does not give up!! She is determined to make her drunk-driving daughter a MODEL!
“So proud of my baby Bella for being on the list of “Rising Model Stars” to watch in 2015 by @VoqueMagazine @imgmodels #WorkingGirl #KeepReaching4DStarsMyLove”
If Yoda was not their mother, neither one of her kids would be “models”! Jello is not enjoying herself at all… her “modeling” photos look painful and sad.
NOTE: There’s really nothing more ugly than watching a mother force her kid into obvious unhappiness.
In this RHOBH preview, DrunkOtis has a party… with NO Fatburger stand!!!
All of her friends and family show up… and Leeeeeeeeeeeza Gibbons thinks DrunkOtis with the bad hair extentions has “fans.” HagfaceKyle shows off her extensive lipo surgery by wearing a cut-out dress. Yoda shows up with some flunkie guy and does her condescending bit when she talks with DrunkOtis and Drunk’s Dad about how proud she is of DrunkOtis. And then… part the waters… PumpMyStomach rudely barges into Drunk’s house party. The only good part about PMS being there? Her zinger to DrunkOtis’ mother and father at the end of this preview… after DrunkO’s mother makes excuses for DrunkO’s behavior. PMS says, “I blame that on the parents.”
More interesting products in HagfaceKyle’s bathroom…Bean-o and Lithium
A caller just happened to ask Yoda a question about her signature cause… lyme disease. FYI: ALL calls go through Diedre, the WWHL Nazi phone lieutenant… your question will be edited or changed completely before it’s asked of a guest. MissAndy was grateful that Yoda could keep her WWHL appearance obligation, unlike her fellow RHOBH cast member **Kim Richards**… and looked genuinely concerned about Yoda’s hidden disability aka Yoda’s “silent killer”!!! So dramatic!! KingD has mentioned in previous interviews that Yoda is using her “silent killer” to catapult her into her own show, since Yoda has become the face of Lyme. Oh, the suffering Yoda does!!
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Yoda’s model daughter showin’ her **GASP** side boob! A stink over a side boob??? After THESE naked poses?? Yoda’s other “model” daughter looks positively torturously miserable in her latest “modeling” pose: Yoda has slid back comfortably into her LymeBed … Continue reading
At the required Housewives get-together… this time taking place at HagfaceKyle’s house… Yoda jumps all over BLEEEEEEECH! PumpMyStomach about not getting an invite to PumpMS’s PalmSprings “star” ceremony. Maybe if Yoda got her really good friend, DrPhil, to come along with her, maybe PMS would have invited her!!
These people are simple morons. Watch as they are filmed being filmed for the RHOBH. Walking around in wooden shoes? How touristy. Worse than that, is Lisa BLEEEECH! PumpMyStomach’s choice of footwear.
AND… outside of their hotel. Poor BalloonLipsLisa… she’s just not as fan-friendly as EmmyWinningEileen! Of course, bleeeeeeeech! PMS just blows off everyone:
PumpMyStomach matches her fellow Housewives with their canine counterparts…except Yoda and herself!
YODA’s $25 million (give or take $5) lemon house is still for sale with Chris Cortazzo… it’s time to turn the sale over to the greatest real estate agent EVER, MO-ritzeo! It’s rumored that MO-ritzeo promised to sing his version of “LemonTree” to KingDavid when he gets the listing! Ironic lyrics considering all the Yoda d-i-v-o-r-c-e rumors…
Poor YODA! It wasn’t even a year from the time she uttered these words until her daughter-Jello-who-doesn’t-want-to-be-a-model was arrested for underage drunk driving! Yoda’s “holier than thou” pride was crushed. It’s hard to live down these words she spoke to Shana:
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NOTE: DavidFoster gives his annual interview to the CanadianPress to get some interest going for DavidFosterFoundation. KingD chats about his many projects, including the plans to STILL bring his BettyBoop musical to Broadway… he’s only short about $15 million. … Continue reading