TWO YEARS AGO TODAY! KomaKathy’s KannoliKits On QVC…

TWO years ago on December 5, 2012… KomaKathy was pushing her cannolis on QVC!  KomaKathy hasn’t been back since… and even revealing her décolletage didn’t help sales!

As promised, KomaKathy Wakile made her debut sellin’ her cannoli kits on QVC this afternoon.

RHONJ Kathy QVC

Kathy’s appearance lasted a little over FIVE whole minutes!  No customer phone calls were permitted.

KomaKathy tried to “sell” her kits by saying that “there are no corner bakeries around any more” and “who has time to go to a bakery?”  So, just buy her cannoli kits!

No point in any further description…. watch for yourself!

 

NOTE:  Thanks “Terry” for sending the photo of the 24-piece cannoli kit… which is EXACTLY the same as KomaKathy’s $44.82 kit… purchased at Costco just days ago for $10.99!!

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RHOBH Preview: LOOK!! It’s Jamie Lee Curtis!!

DrunkOtis screeches in the back seat of a car; CarltonTheDoorman gets tatted; there’s a mannequin breakdown in HagfaceKyle’s store; Jamie Lee Curtis makes a guest appearance…to raise money for those kids that HagfaceKyle raised a whopping $5,000 for in Season One!  Or, maybe HagfaceKyle changed charities… to a kid’s charity of JamieLee’s choice!

If you’re interested in reading these BeverlyHills goofballs’ pre-planned accompanying pieces otherwise known as their BravoBlogs… please read them at BravoTV.com.  ‘Cause we give their predictable words 3328273,39384, 999 Kens and the same number of eye rolls…

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LISA VANDERPUMP: Lisa’s Christmas Pah-ty Advice… From 2011… AND The Latest “Divine Addiction”… Selling GiggyCards Last Year!

Ta-Ta… and Cheerio!  LisaVanderDump gives one and all her very cheeky Christmas pah-ty planning advice…

More pah-ty advice from the latest edition of LisaVPump’s “DivineAddiction” newsletter.  Last year in 2012, the newsletter was selling Giggy Christmas Cards!

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RHONJ: THOSE OFFERS ARE ROLLIN’ IN FOR BUBBAJAX’ DAUGHTER!!

After hearing about BubbaJax’ daughter, Asslee Holmes, doin’ her “modeling”… offers from **cough, cough** legitimate sources started flooding in!!

Well, ONE started to drip in…

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HOUSEWIVES NEWS: New Jersey…Febus FundRaising… NJ Hair Stylist…BubbaJax’ Daughter’s “Business Opportunity”

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A New Jersey winery has raised more than $5,000 to help rebuilding efforts after Superstorm Sandy thanks to brisk sales of a line of table wines with customizable labels.  NOTE:  All they could raise was $5,000???? A hair stylist who has … Continue reading

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RHOBH Season Four Premiere Episode… Preview Part IV… Kyle Richards’ Store Gets Some Attention…

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HagfaceKyle’s store gets some attention on this season of the RHOBH… more than her sister’s consignment store! Just hope that there’s not a spinoff featuring HagfaceKyle and her “sexy” store employees… Manhands gets to open the new boxa frocks first!! … Continue reading

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SH “HIT AND RUN” WEDNESDAY: Halloween Grinch… Monster Mousse… Cell Phone Save… Gold Dump… OJ’s HouseSold

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The Grinch has relocated… and has added Halloween to his grinchiness!  Instead of candy, a woman in NorthDakota is handing out a letter… NOTE TO GRINCH:  MYOB… if you don’t wanna hand out candy, just turn your porch light off! … Continue reading

GUESS THE HOUSEWIFE!… UPDATE… Housewife Revealed!!!

Who is the Housewife with the wrinkly feet wearin’ these shoes???

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NOT:  LuAnnie Lesseps… or NayNay Leakes!

If you guessed KYLE RICHARDS… you are correct!!!

RHOBH KYLE ARROW

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TAKIN’ A SH DETOUR!… SOME INGENIOUS ITEMS… Musical Guests Thomas Dolby And ELO

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Let’s take a break from those moronic Housewives… and look at some very cool stuff available in the REAL world!! SOLAR POWERED CAMPING TENT TABLE TENNIS DOOR CALENDAR RING SELF-LOCKING BIKE COOL CUP ZIPPER EAR PHONES BRAILLE RUBIK’S CUBE WIFI … Continue reading

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CAROLINE MANZO: “Manzo’d With Children”… DonCaro Thinks Everyone LOVES Her and Her Lil Manzoids!!… FEBUS!!!!

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NOTE:  For all who are now just hearing/reading that those FEBUS-lovin’ Manzoids got their own spinoff show… the following was originally posted ten days ago on SH, September 17… DonCaro actually thinks that people LOVE her… and her lil Manzoids!! NOTE: … Continue reading

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RHONJ Contract: NOT A HOUSEWIVES Contract… Standard Appearance Waiver… FOR Unpaid Appearances…

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What an opportune time for someone to “LEAK” an actual Braov/SirensMedia RHONJ Housewives APPEARANCE  contract!!  This is another PR move for RHONJ finale ratings. Do you really think that SirensMedia would let one of these UNSIGNED appearance contracts slip outta their hands?? … Continue reading

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MORE “Kinda” Housewives News! … Gorgas…Teresa Guidice … HoneyBooBoo… BIG BROTHER!!!

News for da Gorgas!!  Many married men polled said they stopped caring about their looks 26 months after the wedding.   Hmmmm… just a bit over the two year mark!  Does JoGo realize he can now stop wearin’ that annoying ever-changing … Continue reading

MELISSA GORGA: MeGo’s Amazon Customer Reviews… The Gift That Keeps On Giving!!!… “Useless Marriage Advice”… Joe Gorga Had To “Break Her Down” To Marry Him!

RHONJ TREE CHUCKY BOOK COVER SH II

OOPS!!!  Wrong book cover!!!

JAX BOOK COVER 6.17.12

OOPS!!!  Another wrong book cover!!!  

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OH NO!!!  Another wrong book cover!!!!

MELISSA BOOK COVER HH

OOOOPS ANOTHER wrong book cover!!

Here’s the right one…

RHONJ MELISSA BOOK  cover ARROW

The number of customer reviews for MeGo’s “love and marriage” book on Amazon has jumped from 48 to a new total of 86!   Yes, there were only 48 yesterday!  FORTY new reviews in 24 hours!

66…SIXTY-SIX… outta that eighty-six are ONE star reviews!  Those FIVE-star reviewers are attempting to keep up with the total annihilation goin’ on at Amazon, but they may as well accept defeat!

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Some interesting categories!!

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These are just a few of the NEW customer reviews:

  • I can’t believe this book was actually published! Don’t publishers check the work first? I thought the title was cute and wasn’t expecting a master piece, just some simple entertainment. After reading the first chapter, I had to go back and read it again. I couldn’t believe how it had been written! Very choppy and no continuity. Don’t get me started on the grammar. I felt like I needed a red pen to start correcting things! Kind of like my kids middle school book reports. I never did finish the book, my head was killing me. Life is too short to waste time on this book. I feel cheated out of fifteen bucks and my time for someone else’s gain.
  • I think that the publishing house should be ashamed and called out publicly for publishing this tripe. I do believe that this may be the worst book I have ever read. There is no shame in meeting your husband while you worked in a Gentleman’s Club that he frequented. There is no shame in marrying a man for his money and then falling in love with him. But, even the true version of her life prior to being on RHONJ would have been boring. I was not expecting a literary masterpiece. But, as a teacher, I wanted to slash nearly every sentence with a red pen, until I got so exasperated I could read no more. How in the world did this woman get into college. She mangles the English language as if she was angry at it. As to the content of the book and her hot and happy marriage. I am surprise a woman with three children could be so immature, shallow and vapid. If she really believes this idiocy that she writes about, which is the antithesis of feminism and reality in 2013, then she won’t be married much longer. She truly does not know what love is. And that is very sad.
  • Shame on whoever green-lighted this book as a favor to Bravo. Have some standards.
  • This book is ridiculous. Everything she says contradicts what she said on Tv & in Magazines. She didn’t get married until 2004 & met Joe in 2003. In the book she says she married Joe in 2000. She is so fake & is the biggest liar I know. There is nothing in this book that is even true. It is a work of fiction. Her marriage is a joke. Don’t waste your money on this farce of a book!!
  • She sounds like a cat in heat but even her singing is better than this garbage. I think maybe one of her kids helped her to write it because it appears it was written by a 5 year old. She is in love, I will give her that, but not with Joe the worm. She is madly in love with herself. I am still trying to figure out how she got a publisher to publish this nonsense. Stick to being a wife and mom Melissa, you have no other talents. Don’t waste your money on this. I could barely get through it but I read it in an appropriate place, the bathroom. Too bad I couldn’t flush it.
  • You want some essential newly wed advice from this fabulous book? POOP!!!! Yes, poop. Apparently you aren’t supposed to let your husband know you do it, nor are you supposed to let him know you grow hair on your legs and armpits. Human women are so last year! Why have a breathing female when you can have a fake one, right Melissa Gorga? Don’t forget not to poop!
  • This book made my IQ drop 20 points!!! I never liked her on the show and thought she was a big fake but got her book just to see if I can find another side to her and maybe she can b honest in her book…guess not all boring crap that I didn’t care to read ! U can tell that everything she writes is just as fake as she is on the show! Whoever gave her a book deal is crazy! The language and grammar is that of a 8th grader ..with all her money she should have paid for some1 to write the book for her! Good thing I read the book in an hour because I’m bringing it right back to the store ..I refuse to pay for crap !
  • Since I’m just learning to read books with lots of pages, my tutor thought this would be a good starter book for me. Before I started, I shaved my pits & legs, gave myself a good bikini waxing, threw on some yoga pants, and put on a super hot top over my to small push-up bra. I also ordered Chinese food & put it on a plate for when my man came home. I wrote a quick note to my “King” on the napkin next to the Chinese food. The note said, “Dear King, This is your queen, I’ve shaved, haven’t pooped , and prepared this meal for you. You can find me in my recording studio, reading my first book with lots of pages. Your Devoted, Queen.”   I don’t understand all the hateful reviews. For a first time reader, I found the sentence structure to be very simple. Perhaps this book should be required reading for middle school girls. My favorite part of the book was, “Loin & The Ram: A Wild Love Story”. Who doesn’t love a great zodiac story! I hope Melissa Gorga’s second book with lots of pages in it, has more zodiac stories.   If you haven’t read this yet, download some of Melissa’s iTunes songs, strap on some headphones, and engross yourself in the tale that Melissa Gorga wove. Just be sure to properly groom yourself and put some Chinese food on a plate for your “King”.

 

SH reader @JenGotClassNass contributed to the literary lashing…

RHONJ Melissa gorga amazon review

Just to be fair, a sampling of the FIVE star reviews:

  • I love Melissa and Joe and I read this book in a day. Their marriage is similar to mine and I agree with most of what she says. I enjoyed it. Not sure why there is so much hate going on. If you aren’t happy in your marriage you should take some pointers instead of saying nasty things. Hmm…
  • They are a perfect couple! In addition to all the fascinating background information, Melissa also shares fashion and beauty tips and advice. I love getting the inside scoop! So fun that Melissa included her make up artist in her book! (I hope he writes his own book one day…soon!)   I was also happy to find the book is completely in Melissa’s voice. It sounds like her when I read it.   I didn’t get the feeling there was a ghost writer involved with this at all.

NOTE:  Nice try to quash those ghostwriter questions!  ‘Cause everybody knows that MeGo slaved away, writing EVERY night curled up in a corner of her sofa from exactly 10 pm to 2 am!  

Maybe that last reviewer didn’t get the “FEELING”… but, as EVERYONE knows, MeGo’s book was written by the same ghostwriter who wrote Snooki’s Pulitzer-prize-winning books… Valerie Frankel, as mentioned on SH back in December!  Val’s dream is to write a NYTimes Bestseller.  YO!  Val!!  Creep on over to TreeJoodice’s marble mausoleum…heard she’s looking for someone to collect more recipes for her next cookbook!   Somehow it always winds it’s way back to Tree… poor MeGo!!

 

RHONJ Melissa Gorga pg

JoeyMarco Gorga has been in love with PoopyPiggyMeGo since he laid eyes on her…  AAWWWWW.  Raise your hand if you, too, fell in love with MeGo since layin’ eyes on her.   Thank you, Johnny… you can put your hand down now.  We can see your hand… the room temp has dropped 15 degrees  from your hand wavin’!  Down, Johnny… down!!

JoGo had to “break her down” to marry him?  What an accomplishment!!  When there’s wife #2, JoGo will know better…     

RHONJ Gorga book cover

(Thanks to SH readers “PMG” “@JenGotClassNass” and “HousewifeHoe”!!!!)

MELISSA GORGA: Look at How MeGo Has Changed… Is That A Wig??

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NOTE:  The more you look at MeGo’s “new” hair, the more it looks like a wig.  The part stays the same in every photo… the styling is practically identical in every shot.  Let’s see her run her hands through it and let’s see her kids grab a handful of it!  Money on “it’s a WIG!”

(Thanks to SH reader “MrsKH”!!)

MELISSA GORGA: Amazon Customer Reviews… UPDATE!… 13 USED Books Waiting To Be Sold!!

melissa book cover

OOPS!!!  Wrong book cover!!

RHONJ MELISSA BOOK  cover ARROW

Just overnight, the customer reviews on Amazon.com written re Melissa Gorga’s book, have gone from a total of 28 to 48!

RHONJ melissa book amazon

As you can see, the majority of the customer reviews land in the ONE star category.  The five-star reviewers are fighting back!!!

Included in the five star category is a customer review by “HappilyMarried”:

5.0 out of 5 stars LOVE this book, September 17, 2013

“I found this book to be lighthearted, interesting and fun to read. I will be giving this book as a gift to my girlfriend who has an anniversary coming up. Definitely recommend purchasing it.”

“HappilyMarried” looks very familiar… it’s MeGo’s sister!

The ONE star customer reviews are so much more entertaining!!

This customer is requesting a refund:

  • I was suspicious of this book when the author’s husband was not on the front cover with her. She claimed that God sent him to her but is ashamed to share the cover of the book with him. Worst book I ever purchased in my life. I was so excited to buy another housewife book since Beverly Hills Housewife Brandi’s book. This housewife book is boring.There is nothing interesting about her life and her so call hot marriage. The only thing that she has going for her is that she is the sister in law of popular housewife star Teresa Giudice.  This book is a snooze fest. I feel ripped off. I saw that 13 used books are already waiting to be sold. Hopefully I can return my book and make it 14 used books to be sold.

 

This customer has six words:

  • 8 yrs and she really think she has the secrets. I read the kindle version from a friend…so happy I didn’t spend my money. I have six words for this book..’HAVE WE ALL JUST BEEN PUNKED ‘. This writing is all over the place… it’s like pages of unfinished thoughts. I guess when she’s done being a whore in the bedroom her marriage is over. Someone should tell her about this thing called growing old. I would think she would still want a happy marriage.

 

This customer pretty much sums up the feelings of the majority of readers:

  • Talk to me when you are married 35 years. Nobody can write a book on marriage after 8 years.   Also you have to be able to write to write a book!

Melissa book pg

 

(Thanks to SH readers “HousewifeHoe” “@JenGotClassNass” “PMG” and “Jozy”!!!)

JOE GORGA: “Things Nobody Knew”…

The man of many hats, JoeyMarco Gorga, smashed that glass with a vengeance after the last group therapy session at Miraval… he threw that glass seething with animosity, hostility and rancor after he said there were some “things nobody knew” during his chat with Tree:

WHAT possible “secrets” could there be about JMG?  Is he’s referring to the ALLEGED rape accusations…  “Joe actually had charges pressed against him for rape back in the day, but his family pressured the girl to drop the suit.” … made in those “Damn Melissa Emails“???

(Thanks to SH readers “MP” and “cybraxis”!!!)

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TAKIN’ A SH DETOUR!!… A Long OverDue Detour!!

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 NOTE:  We’re takin’ a detour… a detour away from those moronic Housewives!  A detour which has been long overdue!  Let’s visit those Wal-Mart people!!  BUT, before visiting… Personnel  Manager:  “What is your greatest weakness?” Old  Man:  “Honesty.” Personnel Manager:  “I … Continue reading

KYLE RICHARDS: Stayin’ Relevant… Doin’ Splits!

It’s LizardLipLickin’ Kyle-ee!!  She still got that lip thing goin’ on!   Was her doin’ splits a total setup?  DUH!   Awwww…she can’t jump back up on her 10-inch platforms!

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LYDIA STIRLING McLAUGHLIN: Lydia’s Lucky Money Tree… Grandfather Geoff Stirling “Captain Newfoundland”… AND, Lydia’s Other Brother Jesse Stirling

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How does one own “Beverly Hills Lifestyle Magazine,” an art gallery and, in their spare time, have a little side biznezz makin’ blinged out dog collars?  All this “accomplished” by the age of 30! Here’s how it’s done:  be lucky … Continue reading

GUESS THE HOUSEWIFE!… UPDATE: Housewife Revealed!

Which Housewife is wearin’ these sandals?

Guess The Housewife

 

IT’S KOOKOOKELLY KILLOREN BENSIMON!!!

Kelly Bensimon seen out and about in New York City

NOTE to BSL:  This is NOT Adrienne Maloof!! 

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TERESA GIUDICE: Tree’s Nerves of Steel… OR Total Dumbassery!… Will Probably Waive Her Arraignment Appearance

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KimD has opened the doors of her Posche Boutique for Tree’s adoring fans to buy her latest cookbook, “Fabulicious On The Grill”… Tree will be there until 8:30 or 9:00 pm… depending on which release you prefer! Is Tree outta … Continue reading

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From The SH Archives… ONE Year Ago: Teresa Giudice’s MakeUp Artist Spats With BubbaJax… Shana Drunk At Kyle’s Birthday Party… LapbandLauren “No Liars” on RHONJ!… TWO Years Ago: Brandi Glanville, LeAnn Rimes!

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Because there is NOTHING new with any of the Housewives… if you want to call manufactured PR photos or phony baloney pre-approved (PUH-LEEZE!) *exclusive* “interviews” with the Housewives in which they say nothing that hasn’t been heard before… the following … Continue reading

MELISSA GORGA, JOE GORGA: JoGo’s New Look… Plump Lips, Shaved Head, Dirty Clothes…

JoeyMarco Gorga is definitely catering to his key demographics… the middle-school-aged boys… at last night’s premiere of “Grown Ups 2.”

JMG is showing how he is cutting back on expenses… with the summer buzz cut!  BUT, that savings flies out the window with the coat of the lip plumping injections…

GORGA HAIR I ARROW

GORGA DRESS I ARROW

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GORGA HAIR III ARROW

GORGA LIPS ARROW

 

NOTE:   JoGo always reverts back to his usual “look”:  juvenile and dirty!  In the immediate photo above, it appears that he didn’t bother to select a less-dirty t-shirt from the laundry pile!  

Note to MeGo:  Don’t forget to wipe off that messy spray tan stuff before you return your clothes to that local boutique!  (If you didn’t catch the letter to Melissa Gorga about her stained clothes the first time around… see SH July 8, 2013!)

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TERESA GIUDICE: Tree’s Been “Cash Only” For Quite A While!… Signed Bottles “Collector’s Items”?!

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There’s some chatter about **GASP** Teresa Giudice bein’ a CASH only-type. If you’ve been a SH reader, this comes as no surprise to you!  SH readers have known about Tree’s CASH requirements since December 2012! NOTE:  We say “Good For … Continue reading

RHOC PREVIEW: Goin’ Back To The Jeff Beitzel Days…

Bravo  Wretched BLEEEECH Rossi’s involvement with her late SugarDaddy, Jeff Beitzel, is a topic of the producers digging deep for story lines of conversation.  Wretched proves that she is NOT  a”highly educated” GoofyGirl when she tells Vicki:  “Quit tryin’ to personify on me.”

NOTE:  “He’s old, he’s rich and he’s dying”… guess who said that!  For a clue… SH July 27, 2012.