RHOBH Preview: The Slap

One must listen to Loada’s pomposity before the SLAP!

RHOBH Preview: Loada “Runs Into” Old BF

Loada uses her LymeBrain as an excuse for not remembering an “old boyfriend” from 40 years ago in this totally phony baloney and utterly rude Holland scene… 

This preview gets 88939665403003037644 eye rolls…

tina fey gif eye roll

RHOBH PREVIEW: Loada Gets A Free Trip To Holland! HagfaceKyle Loses Her Luggage And Forgets That She Nagged Kim For Being Late…

Yippee-Ki-Yay with a tulip on top.  A new “Housewives Fight In Another Country” three-arc story line.  It’s snoozefest time just thinking about it.  It appears that EyeD and PumpMyStomach found better things to do… like blocking on twitter!!

Will Loada fall ill enough to get a snapshot of herself in a Holland hospital for the continuing saga of her “Look At Me Vit My Sad LymeFaces”?  OR, will Loada call for a private ambulance to hook her up for a “stick an IV in me” selfie to fill her LymeGlobalTour scrapbook?

Will Loada stop by to see her mother?  Loada probably still has ill feelings toward her mother after Loada brought home her first fiancee!  Look, Mom… I’m a nice Catholic girl who’s gonna marry some Mooslem guy!  He’s not that good looking, he’s a really different religion and his name is MOhamed… but I LOVE his money him!!  Perhaps Loada and her mother have patched things up since Loada latched on to a bigger fish…

Really, HagfaceKyle???  You REALLY don’t recall nagging Kim four years ago?

RHOBH Preview: The Addiction Story Line Continues…

Poor HagfaceKyle… still hasn’t gotten her lizard lip licking under control!

RHOBH Preview: PumpMyStomach Gets B’Day “Surprise”

rhobh singing gif

More excitement from tonight’s RHOBH… Mohammerhead and LanceBass are among those who “surprise” PumpMyStomach at PUMP.  The only person missing is Cedric…

See everyone jump up from behind the bar…exciting.

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RHOBH Preview VIDEO: DrunkOtis Goes To Loada’s House And HagfaceKyle Goes To PumpMyStomach House To Talk About Kim And DrunkOtis… Despite Her Illness, Loada Remembers Yoga Poses!!

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DrunkOtis pops in at Loada’s house during a RARE time that Loada ISN’T affected by her life-threatening disease for a yoga lesson. Loada tells the private yoga instructor that DrunkO hasn’t had a drop of al-kee-haul or any sugar… the … Continue reading

RHOBH Preview: The vanP’s Enjoy Their Free Lunch

The vanP’s linger over their required free lunch scene to discuss how best to use the fabulous acting abilities of their cast mates!

NOTE:  You can see PMS’s great acting in her “ManTrap” music video HERE.  Along with music videos, PumpMyStomach was also TOPLESS in “Killer’sMoon”… TOPLESS!!

lisav killer moon movie

LISA TOPLESS I CEDRIC

RHOBH Preview: PumpMyStomach Acts Shocked; Kim Says MYOBizWax!

In another preview of the next can’t-wait-to-watch episode of the RHOBH.  PumpMyStomach pulls out all of her acting abilities to look shocked when her employees and a few Hollywood friends jump out from behind the SUR bar to surprise her.  (Watch in slo-mo; PumpMyStomach is anticipating the big surprise.  Besides, it’s in the script!!)  

And, we’re totally with Kim… mind your own biz-wax!!

The MOST shocking nanosecond of this preview… Loada appears!!!  Where’s KingD?

rhobh loada RHOBH preview at SUR

RHOBH Preview: More Of The Same! But, The BIG Question IS “Who Gets Custody Of Kim?”

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RHOBH Preview: Custody Battle Over Kim Continues!

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HagfaceKyle abandons her gays at her gay mixup mixer to further whine about DrunkOtis kidnapping her sister, Kim. HagfaceKyle gives a brief apology to her gays and then returns to sniggeling and sniveling about DrunkOtis and Kim to the GladysKravitz’ … Continue reading

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BigLipsLisa Says Nothing In Her “WhyBother” BravoBlog… Zip, Zero, Nada.

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NOTE:  The point of BigLipsLisa’s BravoBlog is __________??  Obviously, BigLipsLisa was busy this week being totally amazed that she’s married to HARRY HAMLIN!!! Remember not so long ago when some of you were asking when Season 5 was going to really … Continue reading

RHOBH Preview: HagfaceKyle Throws Gay Party… Loada Packs

HAGFACE KYLE is in charge of the gay segment of the RHOBH and throws a party for her gays.  (MissAndy has renewed her Bravo contract for another five years for throwing her big gay party.)  HagfaceKyle is pretty damn chipper for someone who is ailing with Fibromyalgia and DRY EYES!!

Loada says that she must have traveled more than anyone in the world.  Hardly.  How bizarre that Loada can walk, talk, read AND pack!  No LoadaLymeFace… at least until she’s done partying in Italy with Loren and Clooney!

Loada now allows the location of her far-from-the-ocean house up on a hill in Malibu to be shown on the RHOBH.  Loada totally freaked out when she saw photos of her house location on SH last year… HERE.  

LOOK AT MY LEMON HOUSE!! IT'S MILES FROM THE BEACH... AND YOU HAVE TO CROSS PCH!

LOOK AT MY LEMON HOUSE!! IT’S MILES FROM THE BEACH… AND YOU HAVE TO CROSS PCH!

RHOBH Preview: PumpMyStomach’s Kid Might Be German!

PumpMyStomach’s kid issues continue.  Will he be German?  Will Bravo pony up the cash for the genetic testing?  Hey, why not… he’s not asking for his wedding to be paid!  

RHOBH Preview: It’s DejaVu All Over Again

This is deja vu all over again.  How many of the same scenes with different Housewives can there be?  Cedric crashing the SUR opening was much better…

RHOBH Preview: PumpMyStomach’s Kid Has Questions

The weak story lines about kids continue.  Looks like instead of weddings, Bravo will be shelling out money for genetic testing.

We’re givin’ this preview 9999999999999999 Kens!

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RHOBH Preview: WATCH DrunkOtis Tell Smothering Loada To Bug Off!

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Loada hates drunk people… PREDICTION:  Loada will not renew her Bravo contract.  Her work to get puffy-faced Alana and depressed drunk Jello “modeling” careers, even though they are not model material, is done.  Loada is sick of being called out on … Continue reading

RHOBH Preview: PoopyPiggy DrunkOtis Is “Creepy” And Assaults HagfaceKyle!

DrunkOtis is disgustingly creepy… and assaults HagfaceKyle!  

LymeYoda wasn’t with this Cast of Clowns, but was seen in NYC heaving a CA king mattress out of Jello’s new “student” apartment.  Afterward, LymeYoda hopped into her private ambulance for a quick “stick an IV in me” LymeFace photo op!

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RHOBH Preview: Kim Faces Her Weakness At Wine Tasting

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Allegedly, HagfaceKyle arranged the wine tasting “lunch”… and her rehabbed sister has to endure the smells and swirling of the wine.  Interesting that the usually vocal PumpMyStomach says nothing.  Kim looks pissed, but accepting of the fact that this is a … Continue reading

RHOBH Preview Part I: PumpMyStomach’s Lazy Kid And HagfaceKyle’s Kid Goes To School

PumpMyStomach has a chat with her lazy kid who couldn’t even find a job on his own… but PMS is OK with that.  The BEST part of this preview is HagfaceKyle saying that she doesn’t know why BigKathy didn’t push her in the direction of higher education…

big kathy pg

RHOBH Preview Part I: The DrunkOtis/PumpMyStomach Sit Down Continues

YAWN.

NOTE:  DrunkO wasn’t totally off the mark about PMS living in the Valley, info allegedly told to her by HagfaceKyle.  PMS and HouseHusband owned property in Calabasas, but didn’t live there.  There were never any bankruptcy filings found.  See February 13, 2014.

 

RHOBH Preview: LymeDance, UglyCry And A WineToss

Yoda does her Lyme dance, KagfaceKyle does her fake sobbing and DrunkOtis does the expected wine toss in Eileen’s face…

RHOBH Preview: DrunkOtis Throws A Party… PumpMyStomach Shows Up

yoda mystery guy

In this RHOBH preview, DrunkOtis has a party… with NO Fatburger stand!!!

All of her friends and family show up… and Leeeeeeeeeeeza Gibbons thinks DrunkOtis with the bad hair extentions has “fans.”  HagfaceKyle shows off her extensive lipo surgery by wearing a cut-out dress.  Yoda shows up with some flunkie guy and does her condescending bit when she talks with DrunkOtis and Drunk’s Dad about how proud she is of DrunkOtis.  And then… part the waters…  PumpMyStomach rudely barges into Drunk’s house party.   The only good part about PMS being there?  Her zinger to DrunkOtis’ mother and father at the end of this preview… after DrunkO’s mother makes excuses for DrunkO’s behavior.  PMS says, “I blame that on the parents.”

More interesting products in HagfaceKyle’s bathroom…Bean-o and Lithium

KYLE BATHROOM

RHOBH Preview: The Required Sex Discussion Scene…

UNBELIEVABLE.  The sex-talk scene is now a required scene on all Housewives shows, it gives MissAndy the giggles.   Another reason to NOT watch this crap.   The viewer demographics have now gone down to mid-teens…

 

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RHOBH Preview: Two Lisa’s… What To Do With Moms And Swans

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In this exciting glimpse of FlippyDrippySlippyLippyLisa’s life at home, we find her discussing how she still has the body of a teen when she lays down the rules with her daughter’s about taking her clothes and how her mother in … Continue reading

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RHOBH Preview II: Lunchtime With Yoda, Rinna And Leeny… Yoda’s Emergency Ride From Restaurant!!

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RapaciousRidiculousBulbousBalloonLipsLisa has brought together two Malibu Housewives, for whom LargeLipsLisa has sacrificed her time by driving from her home in Beverly Hills to Malibu.  Which brings the obvious question:  Why didn’t DuckyLipsLisa pick up DrunkOtis and maybe even HagfaceKyle for … Continue reading