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The Stanker Speaks…

Millionaire Matchmaker aired last night.  I don’t watch the show, but am constantly amazed at the quotes made by Patti Stanger that I read on other sites.  I came across this article written by Elizabeth Garone for The Wall Street Journal… Patti can even BS the WSJ:

It was seventh grade when Patti Stanger made her first match: she successfully set up her best friend with a boy at a local dance.  (Uh, two 12-year-olds went to a movie… she’s counting that as a ‘success’?) Today, Ms. Stanger is the owner of The Millionaire’s Club, an elite matchmaking service based in Los Angeles. She also hosts Bravo‘s reality show “The Millionaire Matchmaker.”

The Stanker and her matchmaking ‘pros’, Destin and Rachel (married before they worked for Patti)
Name: Patti Stanger

Age: 51
Hometown: Short Hills, N.J.
First job: Coat salesperson, Hahne & Company
Favorite job: Matchmaker
Education: B.F.A. in film from University of Miami
Current position: Founder and president of The Millionaire’s Club and host of “The Millionaire Matchmaker”
Years in industry: 20-plus
How I Got Here in 10 words or less: I have a gift. I just know what I’m doing. (Some gifts should be returned….)

Stanker screaming giving advice to a client

Q: You’re a third-generation matchmaker. But one of your grandmother’s earliest matches—for your mother—didn’t go so well and ended in divorce.

A: She was horrified because she had fixed them up. When you were single in [the 1960s], it was like the Scarlet Letter. So my grandmother went back out on the street (so that’s where Patti learned where to find her ‘girls’) and fixed her up with my father. They did this through the local temple. The rabbi got wind of it, and he said, ‘If you guys are going to be doing this, can we send you friends and family?’ My mom and my grandmother started holding cocktails parties and introduced the local singles.

Patti and her fiance Andy Friedman… Oh..they broke up?!    Look at that body language…

Q: Your first real job in matchmaking was in special events and marketing at Great Expectations, the oldest dating service in the U.S. What do you consider your first professional match?

A: I dated a guy and he liked me but I didn’t like him. (You matched yourself up first!?  Selfish, Stanker, selfish…) I went through his wardrobe and cleaned out his house and got him to get a new car.  (Hmmm… he bought the car and didn’t have any money left for dates, so you dumped him!?) He said to me, “If I give you $10,000, (Puh-leeze, he probably offered you $10 bucks to go away) will you find me my wife because I want someone like you?” And within a year, he got married. (That was the first match that led to me leaving my corporate job. [Before that] I had this as a side business.

Q: Why did you stay in the corporate world so long?

A: I was a VP of marketing, I was regional sales manager in fashion, and marketing director in communications and product development. (Name some names and maybe I’ll start to believe this spittle.) I was always a corporate Fortune 500 girl. I needed my pension, I needed my 401(k), I needed my insurance. (She knew even back then that she couldn’t even ‘matchmake’ for herself.) I couldn’t even imagine a world not knowing when money was coming in. I had to realize this was a business. Silicon Valley was booming with millionaires coming down from San Francisco to L.A. every weekend trying to get their “hottie patottie” and find their future wife. They didn’t know how to date, they didn’t know how to talk to girls. (Oh God…they went to YOU for giudance?)

From her book ‘How You Can Get There, Too‘:

Best advice: “You have to follow what you know to be true,” says Ms. Stanger. “If I listened to everybody else, I would never be doing what I’m doing now.” (Sometimes other people are right.)

Skills you need: The essentials are intuition, a sixth sense, seeing both sides of the story, and knowing what the truth is, says Ms. Stanger. “It’s not just fixing people up. It’s also counseling all day long. It’s like being a therapist.” (In her case, a massage therapist.)

Degrees you should go for: “You don’t have to have a degree to be a good matchmaker,” says Ms. Stanger. “It’s having the eye, knowing who belongs with who.” (Patti:  Maybe you should go back for that degree…)

Where you should start: “If you start young, practicing on friends is the best way to go,” says Ms. Stanger. Otherwise, the Matchmaking Institute in New York City (Does the Stanker get a kickback for referrals?) offers a good introduction, she says.

Salary range: The average salary for professional matchmakers in New York City is $75,000, according to salary website Indeed.com. (That’s the average … realistically, it’s more like $20,000 or less… poverty wages for NYC.)

Q: So, your job isn’t just about matching people up for dates or relationships? You do the prep work.

A: [Early on] I realized coaching was three-quarters of what we do in matchmaking. (So Patti studied football coaches and adopted their style.) It’s not really just getting them on the date. It’s making sure they know what to do and say on the date, like you see on the show. It’s asking, “How was the date?” “What did you wear?” “What did you eat?” “What did you do?” “How did you ask her out for the next time?”

Q: How is your club different than other dating services?

A: We offer unlimited dating because the process is never-ending. (If you’re successful, the process should be quick.) I don’t want [the clients] to run out of options. I’ve had people get married off one date. There are others who take five years. Everybody is different. (Where are these people, Stanker?)

The Stanker tweeted the reason for breaking off with Andy… they dated for six years and she just found out about no kids?!   IMO, her engagement was a total sham…look at photos of them together… body language says it all

 

Q: How much do clients, the majority of whom are men, pay for your services? How are they chosen?

A: Fees range from a base membership of $40,000 for a year of unlimited dating throughout the U.S. and Canada to a VIP or Diamond Membership, which runs from $150,000 to $200,000. (The ‘clients’ on the show do not pay a fee…can anyone who has paid the Stanker a fee, please come forward?  My email address is listed on the right…) With the full VIP membership, you have the entire staff working for you 24/7 and basically your own entourage of matchmakers. (Well, two people can make an entourage… that’s stretching it, but OK) I screen with my own personal system. (Put all the names in a bowl, dump them on a desk and the names that land closest to the edge of the desk gets a date.) Plus, I grew up in [affluent] Short Hills, N.J., and I can recognize wealth when I see it.  (But can you recognize a man that doesn’t want to marry you?)

Jason ‘Gummi Bear’ Davis, another Millionaire Matchmaker ‘fail’

Q: Why don’t the potential dates have to have money?

A: Successful men don’t date up. They are intimidated by wealthy women unless they are blue bloods. Successful men want to always take care of their women, and that means financially. (What a bunch of crap…the women, ‘potential’ dates, never pay… the Stanker has gotten around this dirty little secret of a fact by gathering them all up for a meet-and-greet party.)

Q: How do you stay in business, considering love is so unpredictable and can go sour?

A: I have a great track record, and I have never been sued.  (She has never been sued because the contract promises a date and she always gets her clients a date; therefore, they have no basis for a lawsuit.) If I can’t find someone for someone, I refer them out. I have an affiliate division of matchmakers all over the world that I work with. Men like certain types of women, (what ‘types’ specifically?) and I can subcontract that out to foreign countries.

Q: If you weren’t a matchmaker, what would you be?

A: I’d be a chef. It’s Zen to me. When I’m cooking, it’s just relaxing. It’s like having a massage or a cocktail. It calms me down. I’m not hyper. I’m very focused. I love the whole process of cooking, and I love to watch people smile when they eat. (Yo, Patti, that’s not a smile…they’re just trying to swallow your food so you won’t scream at them.)