Yoda’s “Can’tBeBothered” BravoBlog… Jello’s DrunkDriving Arrest A “Grave Mistake”!

YODa

Hello Bravo lovers,

I hope you are having a great week. I am sure busy and overloaded with the holidays.  I would like to keep this week’s blog short, as I feel I discussed all in detail last week.   “Detail” = Yoda  glossing over the facts of her daughter’s drunk driving arrest. 

This grave mistake that Bella made has been a big challenge for our family to overcome together. When it occurred months ago, we went through the emotions of being terrified, horrified, disappointed, and sad. Life doesn’t always go according to plan, and we don’t always act in a way that represents who we are. What matters is that these moments become teaching moments. Bella learned a very serious lesson and has to live with her actions, but it’s important to me as her mommy that she learns about forgiveness as well. Forgiveness for one’s self is the only way we can keep going through life and give ourselves the best chance at being the best people we can be.  I’m with her now in New York City, and I am so proud to see her working hard, being kind to those around her, and getting back to enjoying life.  NOTE:  Jello must have already completed her community service if she’s back with mommy in NYC while mommy oversees Alana’s nudie modeling jobs!!  Jello is still getting over the “pain” of being forced to dip into her savings to pay her atty… whom she can’t call because her new phone was taken away as punishment!!  Can’t wait until next week when Yoda whines about being not invited to PumpMyStomach’s “star” placement!

Much love and until next week,

Yolanda

alana gigi hadid yolanda yoda

About these ads

What’s In HagfaceKyle’s Bathroom?

Diapers and diuretics!

kyle DIAPERS

kyle DIURETICS

kyle diuretics

NOTE:  One would have thought that HagfaceKyle would spring for some better weight loss pills… like the ones SuzanneSomers was pushing on the RHOBH!

SUZANNE PILLS ARROW

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HagfaceKyle’s Sickeningly Sweet Boring BravoBlog… With Her Diapers, DogBowls And Diuretics

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NOTE:  Why do these chicks even bother writing their gushingly saccharin boring BravoBlogs???   They give no real comments on the show nor do they give any personal insight after viewing the episode… which they’ve had for a week before … Continue reading

RHOBH Preview: Yoda Nags PumpMyStomach

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At the required Housewives get-together… this time taking place at HagfaceKyle’s house… Yoda jumps all over BLEEEEEEECH! PumpMyStomach about not getting an invite to PumpMS’s PalmSprings “star” ceremony.   Maybe if Yoda got her really good friend, DrPhil, to come along with her, maybe PMS would have invited her!!

 

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SH EXCLUSIVE!! Santa’s Christmas Housewives Helpers!

christmas HW lisa kyle pg

RHOBH Preview: HagfaceKyle Makes Kim Cry Before Daughter’s Wedding!

Kim’s daughter fulfills the required wedding/recommitment ceremony story line on this season’s RHOBH!  MO-ritz-eo feigns stupidity by asking what he should wear to Brooke’s wedding.  During a phone call, HagfaceKyle comforts her sister and tells her not to cry and THEN tells KimR that their mother, BigKathy, AND their dad are watching over!  Cue the tears!!   Lil Milania FrontPorcha is also featured...

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RHOBH Filming In Holland…

These people are simple morons.  Watch as they are filmed being filmed for the RHOBH.  Walking around in wooden shoes?  How touristy.  Worse than that, is Lisa BLEEEECH! PumpMyStomach’s choice of footwear.


AND… outside of their hotel.  Poor BalloonLipsLisa… she’s just not as fan-friendly as EmmyWinningEileen!  Of course, bleeeeeeeech! PMS just blows off everyone:

 

(Thanks “Conor”!!)

 

PumpMyStomach Matches RHOBH With Dogs… Except Yoda And Herself!

PumpMyStomach matches her fellow Housewives with their canine counterparts…except Yoda and herself!

 

 

DrunkOtis Says HagfaceKyle Is To Blame For Everything!

DrunkOtis is making the media rounds to garner support for her actions against HagfaceKyle and, most importantly, to gin up some interest for viewers to tune in to the RHOBH!  Interesting that the words “story line” are now freely said re the HWs “reality” shows.  We at SH have been chatting about the obvious story lines on Housewives shows for years, despite the many Housewives who claim that everything on their show is all REAL!  The Housewives’ “reality” is created, planned, scripted and agreed upon with the Housewives long before the cameras start filming…  

NOTE:  WHY does KimRichards need DrunkOtis to defend her against ANYONE, let alone HagfaceKyle? 

GO BACK THROWBACK THURSDAY: You Stole My House!!

HagfaceKyle never saw it coming when Kimbecile threw out the house stealing accusation!  Kim explains…

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DrunkOtis On WWHL… Loves PumpMyStomach Hates HagfaceKyle

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Showing that she can be even more disgusting than she is… DrunkOtis goes after two cast mates on last night’s WWHL… “To be honest, I care about her and I love her and that sounds weird. I lived in Northern … Continue reading

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DRUNKS… In Honor Of All The Drunk-Azz Housewives And Their HouseHusbands!

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DRUNKS… IT’S AN OLDIE BUT A GOODIE!!!  MO-Reese tryin’ to hide from Hagface Kyle…. waitin’ for a bus and eatin’ watermelon.  Hagface will never find him!  Ellie Judge after listening to Tamballs rant… in person! David Beador…  after drinkin’ a case of … Continue reading

RHOBH Preview…

We give this preview 7763993746363 Kens…

Tonight’s RHOBH Sneak Peek: KimRichards Gets FreeDresses; HagfaceKyle Avoids Kingsley… DrunkOtis Wants “Family Friendly” Podcast

KIMR KINGSLEY

HagfaceKyle drops by Kimbecile’s house to get an advance look at Kim’s daughter’s free wedding dress and Kim tries on her mother-of-the-bride dress.  HagfaceKyle is in hysterics mode when she learns that Kim’s kids are in bed sick.  Really?  With Kingsley the death-dog around the corner, HagfaceKyle is concerned about getting a sore throat?

Cut to DrunkOtis walking into an office building.  DrunkOtis is meeting with her PodcastOne boss to chat about her podcast’s future and the “explicit” label on her podcast.  DrunkOtis whines that “you just can’t say anything anymore”… PodcastBoss wants to attract more advertisers and DrunkOtis wants to make more money; they agree that the way to do that is to be more family friendly.

Dear DrunkOtis:  Your podcast is not “explicit” … it is disturbing.  The words that come out of your mouth are those of a 13-year-old boy who is trying to impress girls by getting a reaction to spouting a dirty word.

Your immaturity, your lack of intellect and your lack of education is revealed every second an unthinking base word spits of out your mouth on your jackassery podcast.  Your lack of ability to hold a conversation which would engage your guest(s) and will, therefore, engage your listener(s) shows that you are unrefined, unaccommodating, unsophisticated, untalented and unsuitable to be on the air.

The words which you categorize as those which you “just can’t say anymore” have been said… over and over and over and can be heard anywhere.  And they are said by anyone who, like you, lacks the imagination and the intelligence to form more cohesive thoughts without dipping into the sewer of your stock vocabulary.  Don’t expect any “family friendly” sponsors to come forward with the big bucks you’re looking for, as you have already shown the best of DrunkOtis on your podcasts…

Bytheway, we all know that your podcast “career” will be over as soon as it has run its course as your storyline…ala FEBUS’ radio talk show, WretchedRossi’s singing, Heather Dull-BRO’s restaurants, Sonja’s toaster oven, PumpMyStomach’s shoe line, GhettoNayNay’s reporting job, just to name a few. 

Tonight’s RHOBH Sneak Peek II: HagfaceKyle Packs For A Trip

NOTE:   The booooorrrring “packing scene” has been used as filler in every season of every franchise.

Three minutes wasted as you watch HagfaceKyle scurrying around packing for a trip in this required packing scene…while Milania FrontPorcha gets into fake nails and makeup.  HagfaceKyle has no idea that she can actually purchase the perfect beach hat or yacht hat in Spain.   Really… they really do sell beautiful items in Spain!!

 

The Warped Mind Of A Housewife… BlowfishLisa Wants To Look 12 Years Old!

After BloatedBigLipsLisa bloviates about how great her WEN hair care has been for her, you get a glimpse into the warped mind of a Housewife…. a Housewife who does her best to look and act the part of someone years younger, as they ALL do.  However, after BlowfishLipsLisa mentions how sexy the bottle of makeup looks which HagfaceKyle recommended, she takes her wishful image one step further at the 1:20 mark … she actually says that she’ll do anything to look 12 years old.

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DRUNK OTIS’ BLAH, BLAH, BLAH BRAVO BLOG: Smacks HagfaceKyle’s Parenting… DrunkOtis Is A Moron

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The show begins with Lisa Rinna’s birthday party. I watched the show and having not even yet met Lisa R. at this point, I can honestly say I can’t believe she is as old as she says. Lisa looks amazing … Continue reading

Kingsley Has “Gone Away”

Doggie rehab didn’t work for Kim Richards’ dog. HagfaceKyle says that Kingsley has “gone away” and her dog-biten daughter is not afraid of dogs.  Alexia sleeps with THREE dogs.  However, NONE of her dogs are PIT BULLS!

(Thanks “romo”!!)

HagfaceKyle’s Dumped Fiance Michael Tuck

kyle before and after

Did HagfaceKyle REALLY think MissAndy wasn’t going to ask her??  HFKyle said on RHOBH that he was 24 years older…

Michael Tuck… with BreeWalker:

NOTE:  As usual, WWHL was filled with pre-screened phone questions aimed at promoting HagfaceKyle’s stuff.  If there was a “dry eyes” segment, it was missed!!

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Kimmer’s BravoBlog: Free Fatburgers And Wedding Dresses For Everyone!

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Hello… I hope everyone had a lovely Thanksgiving! I made two 28-pound turkeys. One for my sister Kathy’s and one for my house. The kids and I cooked for two days straight! Thanksgiving was just amazing, and we were and … Continue reading

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HagfaceKyle’s BravoBlog…

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Watching Lisa R. getting ready for her birthday makes me smile. Her daughter giving her tips is very familiar to me. My girls hang out in my room while I get ready and give me style advice. When I don’t … Continue reading

Thanks, Michael Bolton!