SH WITTY WEEKEND! Caption This… CAPTIONED!!

MELISSA CAPTION CAPTIONED I

“ROMO” will receive the first copy of MissyG’s next book!  FinePrint:  Missy ran out of money for a ghostwriter.  Missy is still looking up words to use in the first sentence of her book.  Projected release date for MissyG’s book is August, 2028.

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The OC PR Machine Has Begun! HeatherDull-BRO Says It Wasn’t The REAL Her On RHOC!

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You can count the weeks and days until a new season of a Housewives show is about to start when the dribble drabble of banality starts to seep through in boorishly dull interviews.  People “interviewed” the ‘highly-educated’ HeatherDull-BRO about her … Continue reading

RHOBH Reunion Preview: The Moronic Housewives Classy Side

The following is the “smoking gun”???  Once again, MissAndy’s attempt at a bombshell dropping is a huge fail.

An extra!!  LugNutLips stated that she would never be a Housewife… it’s just too much drama for her!

KIM AND HagfaceKYLE BATTLE CONTINUES…

HFKyle begs in her BravoBlog for people to go easy on her and her kids on social media.  Yet, HFKyle continually puts out info and photos for the public to disseminate.  Kim’s daughter, Whitney, asked AuntHagface to take down the hospital photos she put up… AuntHagface refused.  

SHUT UP, LugNutLips!  If there were ever a HW who deserves to get slapped down through the TV screen, it’s buttinski LugNutLips…

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GUESS THE DRIVER!! Who’s Drivin’ MissJuicy??

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MissJuicy was out and about in Montville wearing his snazzy grey velour track suit. There were lots of photos taken of him, but the most important photo… showing who’s behind the wheel… was not taken!!   Cross JoeyOrgan and his … Continue reading

KEN VANDERTODD FACED “SCARY” PROCEDURE… It Was Just Another Hip Replacement!

According to BravoTV, Ken VanderTodd faced a “scary” procedure two days ago!!

Ken Todd faced a potentially scary procedure this week when he underwent surgery to have his hip replaced. After a successful surgery, Lisa Vanderpump is happy to report that he’s doing much better.

PumpMyStomach’s HouseHusband tried out his 2013 “SCARY” hip replacement on the RHOBH:

(Thanks “Darryl”!!!)

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DRUNK OTIS’ GHOSTWRITTEN QUICKY BRAVO BLOG: “Tired Of The Game”

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Hello Bravoistas, It’s a sunny day in Southern Cali, and I’m having fun hanging with my BFF Darrin. It’s our birthday shopping day, which is always fun.  Gee, thought Drunk Otis’ phony boyfriend was her BFF!  As we’ve told you … Continue reading

GO BACK THROWBACK THURSDAY EXTRA: HFKyle On 2011AndyCoop Show… Squirms When Asked If Kim Is Alcoholic

On her 2011 visit to MissAndyCoop’s talk show, AndyCoop asks HagfaceLizardLipLickin’ Kyle Richards if her sister, Kim “CrystalBeth” Richards is an alcoholic.  Hagface Kyle gets all squirmy and doesn’t wanna answer Anderson.

 

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HOUSEHUSBAND JOSHY FINDS ANOTHER PRODUCT FOR TALLMARK TO PUSH… Ditches Her Card Organizers For Nail Polish!

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From Glamour: AAWWWWW… what a HouseHusband!!  Joshy found another product for his wife to push!!   “I really have this housewife situation where my son has obviously been in school for some time and my daughter’s not a baby anymore, … Continue reading

RHONY Preview: Bravo/MissAndy Wants You To Care About BFrankel…

LuAnnie gets the chore of prying into BFrankel’s life.  BLEEECH.  BFrankel’s face is hard to look at and her voice is like a herd of feral cats fighting each other over a chicken bone.

BLIND ITEM! Who’s The NY Housewife With Cheating HouseHusband?

From CDAN:

rhony cast

This NYC Housewife caught her husband literally in bed with someone but still won’t leave the guy.

No wonder he cheats on her all the time and brings people back to their place. He has no fear of her leaving.

(Thanks “chameleon”!!)

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Housewives Selling Everything They Can Before Franchises OFFICIALLY Shut Down…KimZ Pulls “Mommy” Card

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These chicks are desperately pushing anything that comes their way before their shows are officially canceled.  While the Housewives shows are still cranking out new seasons, they are unofficially OVER. We simply cannot see any reason to subject ourselves to … Continue reading

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RHONY: BFrankel Whining… RamonaSinger STILL Divorcing!?

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How interesting that the NYDailyNews also says what we’ve been saying:   that BFrankel brings nothing to this season of the RHONY, except her neverending whining about her “homeless” situation… a real slap to those very unfortunate to actually be … Continue reading

RHOBH Reunion Preview…

It’s “Everything Eileen”!  Watch as Eileen smirks when MissAndy asks her how it was working without a script, because she knows that just ain’t true!  Everyone knows the story lines are planned well in advance:

DrunkOtis should have used one of HFKyle’s lines:

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FRIEND OF GORGA’S EMPORIO MOTORS UPDATE: Bobby Kahn Brother Arrested, Held On $1 Million Bail… Bobby Still A Fugitive

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From CliffviewPilot: The brother of fugitive Afzal “Bobby” Khan, a former Ramsey luxury car dealer wanted by federal authorities for defrauding dozens of customers and lenders, was being held on $1 million bail in the Bergen County jail following his … Continue reading

JOE JOODICE DRIVING DILEMMA SOLVED!!

It’s a win-win situation … JoeyOrgan “Drivin’ Miss Juicy”!!

GORGA CAPTIONED driving miss Juicy!

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JuicyJoe Desperate… Now Considering “Reality” Show

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E! News has exclusive details on Joe Giudice’s proposed reality TV plans while his wife, Teresa Giudice, serves a 15-month prison sentence. Joe, who along with daughters Gia, Milania, Gabriella and Audriana, appeared alongside Teresa on The Real Housewives of … Continue reading

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JOE GIUDICE GETS MAXIMUM FOR DL FRAUD… Judge Says Juicy Just “Doesn’t Get It”

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Superior Court Judge Adam Jacobs gave JuicyJoeGiudice the maximum in his DL fraud case: A suspension of his license for two years and a $10,000 fine. Judge Jacobs based his decision on Giudice’s “general disrespect for the law,” after reviewing Joodice’s … Continue reading

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DRUNKO’S GHOSTWRITTEN BRAVO BLOG… HFKyle Is “Slow and Not Smart”

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NOTE:  The RHOBH BravoBlogs are up (here), except Kim/Kyle’s… all are predictable.  DrunkO’s ghostwritten BravoBlog was selected as it is the most ghostwritten!! Hello Bravo and Housewives Fans, I was almost out the door to watch my littlest actor perform … Continue reading

GO BACK THROWBACK THURSDAY! Missy’s Music “Career”!

Missy says that her music career is not just for fun … or a novelty!  Missy also says that her ‘fans’ are begging her to do a clothing line!  

NOTE:  The next time Missy is begging tweeters to ask questions, ask her about her singing “career”!

melissa gorga tweet questions

AND… an extra added bonus!  Watch Missy chew gum!!  A soundless symphony of lip-smacking cracks and pops better left to the imagination!

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