SH “HIT AND RUN” THURSDAY: Brandi Glanville: POOR, POOR No-Money Brandi “Gets V-Rejuvenation”!! … Brandi Is Givin’ Ideas To Richie and KomaKathy Wakile!!… Da Manzoids Raised $1,300 For Autism…Vicki Gunvalson, Brooks Ayers “Screw You, Tamballs”!!!… Yolanda and David Foster on “The View”…

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Brandi Glanville is getting some flack for excerpts from her book … and says things being said are taken out of context!

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This is Brandi’s book description from Amazon:

She’s the brutally honest breath of fresh air on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, known for her dramatic divorce, her barely-there clothing, and her inability to keep her mouth shut. So why should she change now? Brandi Glanville tells all in this hilarious, no-holds-barred memoir.

Fans have been waiting for Brandi’s scoop on one of the biggest divorces of the decade, since her husband of eight years abandoned her and their two sons to marry country singer LeAnn Rimes. Not only does Brandi spill the beans about her side of the split, the lovable housewife shares the incredible wild ride that took her from a life in the ghetto to Hollywood’s most elite circles. For the first time, Brandi talks about how she escaped a rough neighborhood on the outskirts of Sacramento and stumbled into a successful modeling career that swept her into a world of Paris Fashion Weeks, private jets, and uncircumcised penises. Before she knew it, Brandi was the perfect Hollywood trophy wife—at least until her marriage exploded.

Today, the refreshingly filter-free housewife and unapologetic mom is the newest full-time cast member of Bravo’s juggernaut franchise, where she often elicits raised eyebrows and gossip from her costars for her refusal to be the scorned ex-wife, to be bullied, to change her sarcastic sense of humor, or—on most occasions—to wear a bra. Sassy, raunchy, and compulsively readable, Drinking and Tweeting perfectly captures Brandi’s open-book attitude, as she dishes about everything from her DUI, her cheating ex, her one-night stands, and the secret plastic surgery that made her “seventeen” again. You’re sure to enjoy every page of this funny, upbeat, honest tale. Clear your schedule for an afternoon and grab your favorite cocktail, a comfy seat . . . and maybe a Xanax. But that’s for later.

From E!Online

Brandi says that she curled up in a ball crying her eyes out the day she found out that Eddie Cibrian was cheating on her with LeAnn Rimes… then Eddie yanked off Brandi’s workout pants and they had sex.

Eddie Leann

Brandi says that she knew there was something going on between her ex and LeAnn after the two met on the set of the TV movie Northern Lights in fall 2008.

“LeAnn had ‘accidentally’ smeared some cake frosting on her top (she was still a bigger girl and completely flat-chested at the time) and asked my husband, not realizing that I was standing behind the both of them, if he wanted lick it off her,” she recalls in the book. “This woman asked my husband if he wanted to eat the frosting mess she’d dropped on her nonexistent chest? … He hadn’t realized I was there, either, and he laughed with hungry eyes at the suggestion.”

Eddie promised Brandi that he would never marry LeAnn… he lied.

Brandi says in her book, that after Eddie left, she was left with no money or credit…

 “I was a jobless, homeless, mother of two living out of her $1,200-a-month SUV and couch-surfing from one hospitable friend to the next,” she explains. “After my divorce — even with the help of Lexapro — I fell into a bit of a tailspin [and an eventual DUI arrest]. White wine became my constant shoulder to lean on.”

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Of course, she got her revenge — by way of vaginal rejuvenation. “This pretty intense surgery had an even more intense price tag: $12,000,” Brandi reveals. “A brand-new vagina would be an Eddie-free vagina…. I decided that since Eddie had ruined my vagina for me, he could pay for a new one. I gave [the doctor’s office] Eddie’s credit card number.”

Looking back, she appreciates everything she’s been through. “I would like to thank my ex-husband, Edward Cibrian, for giving me all the material I could ever need to write this book and for helping me discover the strong independent woman inside of me,” she writes.

NOTE:  Seriously?  This POOR, very POOR woman… who has nothing, except Eddie’s credit card, doesn’t secure shelter, food and clothing for herself and her TWO boys.  NO… brainiac Brandi spends $12,000 and gets herself rejuvenated.  Again… SERIOUSLY?  This is the bullsh*t that readers of Brandi’s book are supposed to believe?  Sorry, Brandi.  You have two children; if you went through the LA Courts, you are entitled to child support from the day you separate.  You don’t need an atty to get yourself child support; file for support pro se.  This whole character creation of “POOR, POOR” Brandi just don’t make sense.   Last season Brandi’s character was “Head B*tch of Beverly Hills”… then Brandi got an upgrade to full-time Housewife… then Brandi was downgraded to very “poor, Poor, POOR”  single woman, with two kids, Brandi!

Callin’ total BS on this entire Brandi story!

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Whole Foods… just no words.

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BLK VAN NUMBER ARROW

NOTE:  Now it’s “Change The Way You See Water”?  Here’s how everyone sees water:

tap water

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WatchWhatCrappens

It’s another triple funny “WatchWhatCrappens” over at TVGasm!!!  So, git on over there and take a listen!!!

“This week, the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and the staff of SUR all travel to Vegas, and EVERYONE on Bravo eats Moroccan food.

There’s shirtless douche fighting, witless knife wielding, and brainless strip teaching. Come on in!”

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Poor Tamballs!!!

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BUT… at least Tamballs has her bachelorette party goin’ for her!!

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David and Yolanda Foster on TheView

DAVID FOSTER ARROW YOLANDA ARROW