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REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW YORK RECAP: Season Five, Episode Twenty… Reunion Part II

REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW YORK RECAP

 

Season Five, Episode Twenty… Reunion Part II

by Sandi Duffy

Last week on the RHONY reunion Luann got all insulted that Carole told her she wasn’t A-list enough to wear her friend’s gowns.  I’ve got a newsflash for Luann, not only is she not A-list, but she’s AA-list.  That means she went through the entire alphabet and now are starting all over.

We begin part 2 with Luann and Tomas.  I have never seen anyone so excited that she f-ed someone who looks like a celebrity.  My late husband looked like Cal Ripken Jr, but I assure you, I never went around bragging that I was f-ing someone who looked like Cal Ripken Jr.

Bravo invited Jacques on the show and he declined.  Maybe he isn’t such an idiot.  Luann claims Tomas just gave her a ride home.  He gave her a ride, alright.  She is still going with she was hanging around with her “Italian friends”.  Why the cover up on the phone, Luann?  Why were you speaking in French on the phone?  If you didn’t f– Tomas, why were you speaking French on the phone?  Andy calls Luann out on speaking crappy French.  Hahahahahaha.  Andy also confronts her with the “I never change” line.

Andy then asks Ramona to comment on Luann’s partying ways.  Luann alleges that Ramona didn’t behave like a married woman in St. Barth’s.  Luann is a big ol’ slut and we all know it.

                         “I hate you, Carole…”

Luann accuses Carole of judging her.  Luann hates Carole because Carole is a princess and very secure in who she is.  This is the Carole I wish we had scene during the season instead of waiting until the reunion.  I’m all for anyone taking on Luann, except maybe Aviva.  I would even take Charles Manson’s side over Aviva and her leg.

Andy actually asks Sonja if she took it in the rear from Tomas.  Sonja never really answers the question.  Sonja is divorced and not in a relationship, so she can do whatever and whomever she wants.

One viewer calls Aviva out on her hypocrisy–criticizing Sonja for bringing men home, yet her father is scum who sleeps with women younger than his daughter.  Aviva claims she didn’t understand the idea of a girls trip.  Aviva is full of it.  Aviva is a killjoy.

Andy wants to know if Ramona and Sonja swim in the lady pond.  STFU, Andy!  You know they don’t.  He’s so desperate for a gay storyline on each Housewife show.

Gross, they are doing a George montage.  My skin is literally crawling from this disgusting old perv.  I can’t believe these women laugh him off.

The viewers hit Aviva with some good questions about her father.  Sonja is insulted that Aviva was willing to set Sonja up with her father, but wouldn’t set him up with Carole.

I am grossed out by all the George conversation, but am glad Aviva is being called out on her two sets of rules.


Oh crap, we are now discussing the stupid toaster oven again and I think Andy Cohen is reading my recaps because he calls it Toastergate.  We’re only half way through part 2 and I am officially bored.  This reunion should have only been one episode.

Oh, holy hell, Heather and Sonja are back to arguing about this crap.  Sonja even brought sample logos.  THE VIEWERS DON’T CARE ABOUT THIS!  I SPEAK FOR ALL THE VIEWERS!  I’m not listening anymore.

If I ever do reality a TV show, I can tell you right now, I’m coming out with my own slow cooker and recipes.  I love my slow cookers.  I had a Superbowl party where I made everything in  six slow cookers.  I tossed all the ingredients in the cookers in the morning and by the time guests arrived everything was done.

We get a montage of Sonja falling apart.  Aviva comparing her to Ann Nicole Smith was uncalled for.  I know people disagree with me, but I feel badly for her.  She was married to one of the richest men in the world.  I don’t care what her pre-nup or original settlement was for, he can come up with more.  Seven million to this guy is like a hundred bucks to the rest of us mere mortals.  The way Sonja talks about her ex makes me feel even worse for her.  She seems to still really care about him.

Aviva tries to back paddle on the way she treated Sonja.  Sonja wants Jacques and Luann to get married so much.  Newsflash, Sonja, Luann will never re-marry because she’ll lose her Countess title, and we all know how much she loves being The Countess.

I’d like to marry an English Lord because then no one can tell me I’m not a Lady.

Sonja makes me even sadder when she talks about her dog dying.

This reunion show is soooooooooo boring.  Right now I’m missing Alex telling Cindy she needs to get laid and then hyperventilating, that’s how bored I am right now.  I wonder if Couples Therapy is on now.  What is up with that train wreck?

OMG, I’m so bored, I’m doing Jacqueline Laurita non-sequiturs.

We do a Ramona/Aviva montage.  Didn’t we go over this in part 1.  I need to go back and look at that recap, but I’m pretty sure we already went over this.

I still can’t believe that she told Ramona her father shouldn’t have been thrown out of the party because he didn’t rape anyone.

I think Aviva had her lips done by the same butcher who did Carole’s lips.

I am LMAO when Ramona tells Aviva her father f–s 20-year-olds, so he doesn’t act like an 80-year-old.  Ramona calls out the “thousands” Aviva gave to the charity and it was only $500.  Aviva thinks if she or her father don’t raise their voices, they are not being cruel.  She’s an idiot.  Even Andy can’t figure out what Aviva expects Ramona to apologize for.

Aviva then discusses how her mother died from alcoholism and she’s very sensitive to drinking.  Aviva needs a psychiatrist desperately.  Her mother was a drunk; her father is a perv; she doesn’t have a leg; she’s afraid of everything.  TAKE A XANAX!

Ramona goes after Andy for picking on her about drinking.  She tells him he can pick on her for having a big mouth, but she doesn’t drink anymore than anyone else.  Go Ramona!  I’m all for anyone calling out Andy.   Where is Teresa  Guidice to ask him if she’s speaking Chinese?

Sonja talks about her interns.  I need some interns.  I could use people working for me for free.  We find out that Carole dated George Clooney.  I still don’t see that, but I admit I’m jealous.

                                           George Clooney… 2016

Andy asks who changed the most and Sonja says Heather got more attractive.  I think she honestly meant it as a compliment, but it’s a little backhanded.

Aviva tells the story of how SHE decided to cancel her first wedding in Jamaica.  I’m pretty sure that HE is the one who took off on her.

Ramona is so batshit crazy, she gets up to leave while Andy is still asking questions and the cameras are on.  I am laughing so hard, I can barely type.

What would we do without Ramona and her antics?

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88 comments on “REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW YORK RECAP: Season Five, Episode Twenty… Reunion Part II

  1. I never did care for Sonja I always thought her to be a tight fisted, entitled,delusional, Drunken, hobag.
    However this season even though she showed moments of the above I did find myself feeling sorry for her at times. Sonja just can’t accept the fact that the good life at least her estimation of it is gone it is time to adjust to her means, she is still at times (without make-up not so much) a beautiful woman and can still live a rich maybe not in the monetary sense successful life.
    Luann is the worst liar ever she really needs to just stop explaining she is fooling noone, I am certain she screwed the hell out of Tomas she is a horrible liar.
    Aviva in the first part of the reunion her explanations of her phobias and how Ramona and Sonja betrayed her was just nuts. The second part of the reunion she essentially did a 180 but could not keep the disdain from showing on her face, I am glad Andy read the viewers questions concerning her pervy old goat for father, however I think he went a little far when he asked about her father and deceased mother’s sex life what the hell does that have to do with the price of fish?
    Carole I think she is too intelligent for this show, none of the cast memebers are really in her league and she may live to regret signing on for this show, her handling of Luann imo was right on Luann has been dealing out low blow, sneaky underhanded comments to all the cast members for five seasons she can certainly dish it out but can’t take it.
    Heather I quite like, I just wish she would have told Sonja to jog on instead of trying to help her with that stupid toaster oven campaign Sonja was just too ungrateful epsecially as she was getting the services for free.
    Ramona I think is just plain nuts.

    • I keep reading that Heather offered her services to Sonja for FREE, but she (Heather) is a very savvy businesswoman and gained enormous clientele exposure via Bravo – as all of the other housewives.
      Heather is a Politician. A very good Politician.

  2. I liked Aviva in the beginning..not so much at the end. I believe alot of her problem is she has been handled ALL her life (after the accident) with kid gloves & prob never has dealt with women like the RHs. Its kind of obvious, she doesnt know how to express herself without flubbering & saying things she really didnt mean. I’d say Reid also adds to the way she is..he does seem like a very good husband but prob adds to her phobias by flying with her, holding her hand while in an elevator etc. She truly does need to seek professional help so all her anxieties/fears/phobias do not affect her kids. Im sure with the tramatic loss of her lower leg, she had to of received some kind of counselinv back then but apparently, more phobias keep showing up…just like she said happened after 9/11. I will take up for her to an extent..Ramonster can dish it out but she cant take it..she accuses others but conviently forgets what she has said or done. After watching bits&pieces of ALL the RHONY reunions yesterday, Ramonster had a bad beef with some1 on each season-she only saw fault in what they said about her but never would see she had done the same thing. She’ll never change & I just cant like her character on the show. 1more thing about R..it was hilarious 2see Andy get her riled up over being an alcoholic…touchy subject 4 sure! Lu rolled her eyes when R said she Lu drank as much as she does..I knew the girls wouldnt say she had a drinking problem after she threw her hissyfit at Andy LOL! Its very evident Lu has some juicy info about things R has done while on vaca…R backed down real quick LOL!

    Did any1 else notice when Sonja was disrespecting Heather by showing the logos that fans had sent her…she held each&every1 to the camera & for almost the exact same length of time before she went to the next logo. It was almost like she was advertising them…or getting paid to hold them…its very odd-watch it again&see if u see what I mean. Maybe she had told her fans on her blog, to choose which 1 they liked best…but it was very deliberate & there was a reason she had to show every1. Anyway, its evident she wants her old life back but she needs to get a grip & realize he divorced her 8 yrs ago..Its sad because I know she didnt want it but she needs to put an end to it..get what shes supposed to get &move forward. Get counseling, if she needs to but apparently Mr Morgan isnt that great of a man or he would have already paid her what he was supposed to & he isnt being a father to their daughter!!

    I cant wait to see what, if any, changes will be made to RHONY this upcoming season. Im sure they’ll keep crazy eyes Ramonster because they get a big laugh out of her…I dont think she realizes they arent laughing with her, they are laughing AT her.

    And IMO, George is harmless..I think he wanted to act like Mr Suave but it came across as an old, nasty horny pervert. Ramonster overly exaggerated when he held her by the arm…anything for attention R!

  3. Finally getting to this recap. Thank you Sandy! I’ve been lapping up the NJ leftovers from the post dramatic reunion disorders. I put my 2 cents about Aviva over on her Tweet & Bullsh*t blog. and y’all should read my comment because for once I was seriously serious. OK so I think Aviva is wearing the same dress as Jac did at the NJ reunion but in a nude color. Teresa also had a similar seed pearl number in green. I miss Jillz. I think Jillz would have had a wresting shape wear match with Heather. I think she would have bonded with Carole and I think Jill would have confused Aviva in an interesting way.

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