September 11, 2012 2:45 pm Bravo...
Carole Radziwill… “What’s the big deal whether it’s a girls trip? It’s being paid by Bravo… let’s eat!”
I loved sleepovers as a kid. Some of my favorite memories were the nights I spent at my best friend Linda’s house, spreading our pillows and sleeping bags all over her basement floor and staying up way into the morning, talking about boys and clothes and the mean girls at school.
When I got older, I discovered girls trips. My first real one was spring break my senior year of high school. I saved up my money from my job at Caldor and we went to Ft. Lauderdale, and I almost lost my virginity to someone named Mike. Well, not exactly, but it was my first big make-out session, where clothes were shed and hands were groping.
One of my all-time favorite girls trips was the summer of 2003, St. Tropez. Some friends and I rented a villa there, in town, and things that tend to happen on girls trips, happened. We drank too much at night, woke up hung over the next morning, then gossiped by the pool about the previous night’s activities until it was time to go out again. It was perfect. There was booze and boys — and Francois! Francois was the deckhand on the catamaran we rented one of the days. He was gorgeous, and he barely spoke English. He looked like Tom Cruise. He really looked like Tom Cruise. It was uncanny, in fact, how much he looked like Tom Cruise.
****SuperSecretPhoto*** Tom Cruise/Francois and Carole Radziwill on Tom’s boat!
Francois and I flirted on the boat and when the day turned to night we danced until all hours at Le Cav de Roy, the chicest club in southern France. (Tables were involved). Naturally he was in no condition to drive home, so I brought him back to our villa. One thing led to another and we fell in love. At least until the sun came up and I realized I had to sneak him out. We spent the next day driving along the French coastline, roaming thru quaint coastal towns, eating foie gras, pommes frites, brie, and baguettes. When I returned, of course, I was the pool gossip. Me and my Tom Cruise-alike French pirate. My girlfriends and I laughed for days — so fun — about my epic romance with Francois and our deep meaningful conversations.
I love the boys and I love my girls too. Was I looking forward to hosting all of the ladies in St. Barths? Well, I was looking forward to spending girl time together, gossiping around the pool as we do, and also seeing my boyfriend. It was St. Barths after all. It’s almost impossible to have a bad time there. Right?
I couldn’t help but wonder. . .what makes the Perfect House Guest?
I think if I’d handed out manuals when we first arrived, with refresher tips on how to conduct oneself as a guest on a trip, things may have gone smoother. But I didn’t, and this is late, and for what it’s worth to the rest of you, here are some houseguest etiquette guidelines from my Book of Manners & Mischief. Review them carefully before planning a girls trip to St. Barths.
The perfect houseguest, above all, arrives on time and brings all her necessary equipment such as bathing suit, tennis racquet, medications — certainly the hostess cannot be responsible for lending personal articles to her guests, especially her medications. The perfect houseguest will stay on her medication.
The perfect guest sees that her luggage is compact, and has appropriate attire for all occasions. She should appear in the dining room at breakfast dressed for the morning’s activity. The proper attire for breakfast is a simple frock with spectator shorts.
No guest should expect to have every hour of her day planned for her, nor expect to spend each waking minute with her hostess. A hostess needs private time, lots of it. The perfect guest should consider her hostess’ arrangements before her own. She should show up to dinners on time, attend functions that the hostess has arranged, and refrain from unpleasant conversations at lunch.
The polite guest refrains from the truth if the truth is disconcerting. One who has been kept up all night by a barking family dog should not say “the dog kept me up all night.” Unless a remedy is suggested, as in the case of a dry spring roll. It is appropriate to suggest to the hostess a dipping sauce but inappropriate to suggest sex with the chef.
A good guest will roll with the punches. Expect the unexpected; things may not go exactly as you hoped. A good guest will break her nose on the window but not let it spoil everyone’s fun. A good guest should not drink the entire supply of house wine, however she should let go of expectations and help to drink some of it.
If you are a pampered rich girl and can’t get on without a maid, forewarn the hostess to that effect. If your hostess has a personal butler on staff, he can unpack your bag. A polite guest will not take up his time, however, with her luggage alone, nor should she expect him to lay out her outfits, or pick up undergarments, or again, provide sex. A good guest should never expect the master suite, even if the hostess offers it.
Do not give orders to your hostess’ house staff, use up all the towels in the bathroom, toss cigarettes about, get into political or religious arguments with other guests, flirt or make unkind remarks about your hostess’ friends, or again, drink all the wine. In fact, all of the behaviors which annoy your family at home should be avoided when you’re visiting. Your family has to tolerate you, but your hostess can strike you from her list. And probably will.
Don’t expect the household to revolve around you. Vegetarians don’t need to swallow a hamburger with a smile, but they shouldn’t expect their hostess to stop eating meat. If you have anxieties do not bother your hostess or her guests about them, over and over and over. Do not expect your hostess to provide parades or banners or parties. A good hostess will greet you with open arms, settle you in and then take care of her other guests, staff and plans. She will not drool on your husband. She has a lot on her mind.
Don’t invite visitors without asking. While some hostesses are OK with you having a friend, it is wise and gracious to clear it with them first. This is especially true if you are planning on a group of French speaking Italians, or anyone at odd hours who is dressed as a pirate. It is always unacceptable to wake up the other house guests in the middle of the night.
Being a good houseguest means being good company, be good company. Withhold complaints and get into the swing of things, be it vibrant dinner conversation or adventurous activities. A fun time for guest and hostess alike is why you’re there in the first place, and it’s what will get you invited back. A good houseguest wakes up hung over in the morning and gossips with her hostess about the previous night’s activities by the pool.
Lastly, always remember that you’re a guest: Remember to be gracious — after all, she is letting you stay in her rented home. Let your hostess know that you appreciate her kindness. It is usually considerate to reciprocate an invitation but in this case don’t bother. I’m busy.
*Thanks in part to Elinor Ames’ Book of Etiquette (1939) and a bunch of other stuff.
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I like this girl, but that was a bit…….smug.
It was a bit passive aggressive. If she has a problem with those biatches, she should call them out. All of this, “a good guest, a perfect guest, a polite guest, blah, blah, blah…” was tiresome. And who needed to hear about her knocking boots with a Tom Cruise lookalike nearly 10 years ago or very nearly cashing in her V card back in 1970whenever.
totally agree, miss anna….with all those rules, why even bother with a girls trip?. the girls trips i’ve been on are more like spring break with no rules (don’t point out my redundancy)….. you wake up when you want, you drink what and when you want, you plan spontaneously, movies are XXX, music is loud, you dress exactly how you feel, you do your hair or don’t do hair, clothing is freely shared or totally optional, language raunchy, drugs are shared and encouraged and men are for one thing only…etiquettle??? never heard of it. You’re all invited!
Never knew Cinderella was such a condescending hostess.
A bit
She seems so close to normal, I am going to keep liking her anyway. I want to like just one housewife. I hope I don’t get hurted.
Do you guys not know tongue-in-cheek?
Amen, lobstahsmaht! It was funny as sh&t! Carole is clearly the most intelligent and “seer of the big picture” female in this motley crew.She has no need to prove anything or be the center of attention. Methinks Carole is the most mentally healthy of all the House Ho’s. I like her.
Totally tongue in cheek! Hilarious!
I love reading Carole’s recaps of each show, they are always tongue in cheek and very, very funny! How refreshing from all of the other HW’s!
I find her hard to take, pretentious, and her blogs contrived. One or two etiquette quotes or nods might have been funny but the ruse just drags on. Half the time I think she’s thumbing her nose at her famous in laws. *hard to believe the rented setting for the HW trip being the location of her former family holiday was random coincidence.
she tries to hard….
I am also tired of her throwing the Kennedy name around… Ok, we know you were friends with John Kennedy and wife.. We remember what happened… We were sad too.. Let it go please.. Life is to short..
my sentiments! I am always more impressed by those that never mention money, accomplishments, parenting skills whatever. I have noticed that when you don’t
people do still find out and it seem so much more humble to come from someone else.
my son rescued some bunnies from his yard and also some racoons trapped in a dumplster….. he never even told me….when i asked him why he said that he wouldn’t feel good about it if he told ppl…..i guess he felt it would be bragging. I have great respectfor someone who doesnt feel the need to tout their good deeds or accomplishments
You have a great son cherry, I bet you are very proud of him!
I’m serious when I say that you just made me cry. I adore so many ladies and gentlemen here on SH, but that was so sweet of you to mention. Thnak you for making my day…..(it’s the little things)
I hope it was a happy tear Cherry:)
happy tear…happy tear….love my little guy! (haha…he’s a 6-2 230 lb bodybuilder…with a heart o’ gold)
Wow! Outstanding as usual.
Mmmm. Wonder which house guest forgot their meds?
I don’t think they forgot them, I think they all must have taken each others. Heather took Romano’s chill pill, thus walking into the door. Sonja took vivas anxiety pill, and we go her naked and having sex, Luanne took Carole cool pill, and lied effortlessly to her man, Viva had nothing- so we saw the real PT.
PT is in DIRE need of medication and a new therapist cause if she has one he/she ain’t helping …and most of all, she needs to stop being everyone’ s mother judging everything and learn how to have a good time. Whew! How on earth does she raise her children with all that anxiety and hammering the same points over and over ad nauseum.,and the me, me, me it’s all about me. Stop playing the “poor me I lost my leg and people were MEAN to me in school.” Yeah, that was a long time ago. You have a kick-ass prosthetic pair of legs that other amputees would die for, Dearie, and a great husband and great kids. Ramona and Sonjah were a handful but the trip was to have fun on vacation…a free vacation…in St Barth’s.PT was wrong to call them white trash, trashy would have been more like it. Kudos to Heather for talking to the persons she had an issue with instead of gossiping to other ladies. LuMan, is totally an oxymoran…”cheating non-cheater”
A proper hostess does not titter and giggle at rude and crude remarks, made by certain house guests invited to a double date dinner, behind the backs of her other house guests who were excluded from said dinner. Not classy and simply divisive.
After Aviva’s and Reid’s display of uncouthness in St. Barths I doubt they will be receiving invitations from NYC ‘society’ any time soon, if they ever receive invites in the first place. Mimi Maniac really is a loud mouth busy body piece of work – who could stand to be in her company?
Who is Mimi Maniac? Sorry, I’m behind the times
Bravo pays for All the trips.Why act like the HW hags are fronting the $$.You know if they were actually paying for a trip they would not ask any of the women and pick a better class or loved one that they get along with.Carole is there for 1 season one hit blunder and gone.Helping get her new book out and an audience since so many wait with baited breath to read all her blogs. blah blah blah.She does not exercise/sweat just drags along life.Boring no substance.Goodbye!!! Wont miss you or better yet even know you are gone.Snap!!
I totally agree! What a sarcastic and condescending blog! She won’t be back next season. We all know about her Tv pilot and we all know she is writing a book. Job done! She is outta there!!! I really liked her until the st. Barts trip. She showed her true colors here…she is not the super cool laid back hippie chick who loves eccentric and odd ball people! She likes Aviva and Reid for crying out loud!!!!!
Hate to agree (because I liked last episode) but have to do so. She showed her hand. She’s not much different than the rest of them.
On the point of exercise. Carole lives in the city and walks everywhere. Any Dr. will tell you that walking is some of the very best exercise! So, even though Carole has admitted to not going to a gym, therefore not going the traditional exercise root, she is clearly not a couch potatoe.
I also want to point out something else. Carol NEVER claimed that she was footing the bill for this trip. In fact, she has pointed out that BRAVO pays for these trips. Also, when Carol had the luncheon to announce the trip, she told the other ladies that this trip was to celebrate finishing her book and to see her boyfriend Russel and his show in St. Barth’s. Never, was it said to be a “Girl’s Trip.” This whole “Girl’s Trip” fiasco was perpetuated by Sonja and Ramoaner.
I also applaud Carole for attempting to be a peace maker whilst not jumping in the middle of the issue’s and arguments of the other women. From the other HW’s shows we know that jumping in the middle, never works! Besides, jumping in the middle of the disagreements of others is not what mature women do in real life!
I hate that to Susie, they pay for nothing so stop acting like you’re treating the ladies to this wonderful vacation, your not! hell as viewers we are, I want my money back!!!
oh yes….luann was the worst…connstantly with the “her” trip and she invited the girs and sheplanned the trip and she wanted them to have this experience and she planned alovely dinner for all of them……that kinda got to me
Yeah. LuAnn twas annoying!
The big deal with the girl’s trip is that Bravo paid for it and Carole’s role is to “host” it. Carole might be the most level headed one of the bunch, but she was not a “good hostess” because she also used this trip to see her boyfriend and spend time off the Bravo set (the house). Her job was not an easy one because there are so many screaming Alpha Females on this trip.I think Carole felt she was supposed to quiet everyone down; she was able to flit from housewife to housewife like a little butterfly, and whisper, “What is the big deal?” I felt like she was the Margret Meade and the housewives were her gorillas in the mist.
LOL @ gorillas in the mist! Housewives in the Mist.
A good hostess does not laugh when a certain prick calls her guests ‘fat’ and a good hostess would put an end to the constant drama of a certain guest named Aviva who basically ruined the trip for everyone.
Yeah, I don’t get Carole’s love for Aviva? It’s strange. She is just as grating on the nerves as Ramona! Maybe more so, but at least Aviva doesn’t invade personal space. Ramona was all up in Heather’s grill at that Tamarin place – it was making ME uncomfortable! I hate people to get up in my face like that.
I think it’s because Aviva is the kind of New York social climber that would crawl across broken glass to stick her nose up Carole’s ass. Remember when they first met at that cocktail party, and Aviva went on and on to Carole about her book. I like Carole, but she is a sucker for someone to suck up to her.
And a good housewives wouldn’t sit back and laugh as Heather secretly tells her, Lu was with the wanna be Johnny, with eye makeup, for jack sparrow, and doesn’t change his clothes either…
talk about bad hostessing skills!
btw…I really, REALLY liked tomas’ vest….so cool
I did like tomas too, I just thought he was being used by the wome which was sort of sick,
Um, if the trip went smoothly and everyone were a gracious guest and a lady, we wouldn’t have a show. I hope Alex does write a book because I am very curious as to what is scripted and what isn’t. Sonja is drunk a lot or is a really good actress. Still think that phone call to Jacques from Luann seemed sketchy and loud….sometimes I feel stupid even thinking about these shows!!
Or sometimes a good hostess/guest just rolls with the punches.
A good hostess does not talk behind her guests back, if the hostess had a problem with a guest just cross that guest off from the next event.
It seemed to me that Carole was intimated by Aviva’s nastiness. She should have calmly told her to stop the rants. Unless Carole was not aware of all the ugliness of Aviva, but now she knows and I guess is still on Team Aviva. Not good Carole. You should have stuck up for your quests when they were being picked on and beratted.
I couldn’t agree more. I also think that she feels bad for Aviva’s neuroses/ anxieties, as she sees a little bit of herself in Aviva. (still not over the plane crash etc… 12 years later)
The difference is Carole is a stoner who has been medicating herself for a long time, so her neuroses fly under the radar. Whereas Aviva does get off being a neurotic and ruining other’s people’s fun. When she walked in Ramoja’s room in the morning, all collected but sure ready to pick another fight. and being passive-aggressive with Ramona and Sonja. Ramona saw her for the neurotic person she truly is, and took the high road. Sonja was really hurt, her emotions got the best of her. She should have remember and followed this one rule: you can’t argue with crazy.
Sonja just posted her Brave blog and blasted Aviva and Carole as well.
Aviva is a mess. She had no intention of leaving when she first threatened it. She just wanted to manipulate the situation so that the girls begged her to say. Her blog this week is just more of that manipulation.
I agree. I believe I’ve already said this another thread: she is doing damage control after the public and her fellow HWs’ negative reaction to her neurotic, manipulative and killjoy ways. Never liked her from the beginning: there is something off and fake about her effort to portrait a “perfect” life. She is just like DonCaro: judgemental, despiteful , manipulative, and condescending. Also, don’t dare to go against those 2 hags, they are very vindictive as well.
Good God! I guess having those 2 despicable women on TV back to back is a little bit too much, and also a sad reminder of how ugly some people can be.
So, she has had a mind meld with Luann after all, Luann wrote a book on manners.
OMG I just thought of that too! I bet LuAnn is just kicking herself for not holding a Class With the Countess episode on her blog!
Well, at least she had someone write it. She admitted as much. Her writing skills apparently are only exceeded by her song stylings.
That Carole orchestrated a “double date” dinner, excluding the other women, is a testament to her lack of etiquette and breeding. It was such a strange, unexpected move. People like her, who don’t stand up to anyone and try to be the “popular girl” who is adored by all bore me to tears.
Hate to say it, but Carole is a big bore and should not come back; don’t think she will anyway; she got PR for her new book and she doesn’t need the money. What’s the point?
Well I for one absolutely love Carole’s wit.
x 2! I really enjoy her. Nice to see someone writing in a manner that is interesting. Many HW’s barely write a blog whileit seems obvious Carole puts a lot of work into hers. Thanks for the laughs CR!
Carole is a snob. “Slumming in Paradise” would’ve been a more appropriate title for her blog. The other ladies are nutso, which she should appreciate since she is a writer . Instead she uses their breakdowns and behavior to up her “cool factor.”
I think wit is being mistaken for snobbery…..she clearly called everyone out, insulted them and tried to pass it off as clever….uncool the nth!
I couldn’t quite figure out what was bothering me so much about her this week (loved her last week) but you articulated it perfectly. Disappointing, I thought they finally found a decent person.
I still like Heather, “Holla!” and all. She’s proving to be a-okay and holding up well in the toughest situations.
Mags….I can’t understand how heather has grown on me so much but I truly like her. Heck, I’d even go on a girl trip with her. You know the thing is…that I can see her really listening to you if you were having a one on one conversation and having the ability to relate and even empahthize……I think if she was your friend she would be extremely loyal.
You know Arcy, I’m typically anti Ramona (and by the company she keeps, Sonja)… but you make a great point and I really agree with you…. :
“You should have stuck up for your guests when they were being picked on and berated.”
So in this one instance, I’m going to say that Ramona and Sonja didn’t get what they asked for because PT was waaayyyy over the top and no one should have pandered to her.
Was that a lecture? Did she also pick up a book on being a good host? That whole St. Tropez story sounds like fiction. Dramatic lies. Make believe. I’m not impressed by Carole and I think she’s a phoney. I think Carole would like to be the character she is trying to portray on TV – but she’s not, and imo the real her is starting to show through the cracks that are appearing in her TV persona, starting with her insincerity and condescension as she constantly talks (superciliously) behind the other women’s backs, while trying to appear coolly amused, as though she’s critiquing them from some lofty position; and despite all the “princess” and “Kennedy” hype, Carole’s social skills seem unsophisticated and she appears totally inexperienced at even basic entertaining for a few friends as she was unimpressive as a hostess at her very small Christmas dinner-party and “lunch” at her apartment was ridiculous: She actually has real girlfriends, her own age, who get together and eat carb-laden, take-out pizza in the middle of a regular weekday? Really?
spectator shorts???….. I’ve only heard of spectator shoes….but then what do i know???
Touche!
I think Carole should have taken Aviva aside and told her to calm down so she doesn’t ruin everyone’s fun and told her that Ramona and Sonja did not do anything malicious deserving the insults that were flying out of her mouth.
Carole was the only one NOT making a drama induced scene while at the guest house. Seems like she is entitled to some good natured ribbing in her blog 6 mos later. Not sure why some here are being SO sensitive to it. Perhaps they didn’t like the voice (in their own head) when they read it??
ITA. And for those claiming she’s such an Aviva fan, she twice asked Aviva to drop it, but because Carole tries to be subtle, and Aviva’s a dingbat, Aviva only partially got the hint. But for those thinking that she’s Aviva’s biggest fan, she definitely called her out on this blog. She called everyone out, but it wasn’t that serious. She called everyone out with the lack of gravity that all of the silly behaviors deserved.
trust me the commenters here are not “SO sensitive”…observative,absolutely……sensitive,not so much
I think Bravo encourages a “host” for every event. That way there is one person in charge, who HAS to deal with issues, therefore creating more drama. If every trip or event was just a free for all, there would be no one to blame. With everyone getting a turn to host, each housewife has an equal chance of disappointing and consequently being harassed by the others.
And Carole was clearly writing tongue in cheek. She was making fun of the idea that good manners vs. white trash is even an issue at all with this group. The housewife franchise (and reality TV in general) is so far past the point of graciousness that bringing etiquette up at all in this context is laughably ridiculous.
And obviously she was also taking a dig at LuMann’s silly etiquette book. Because if anyone is low class in that group it’s the Countless.
I think at the point of the “double date”, Carole had given up trying to corral the loonies. She just didn’t care anymore. And I’m sure it would have been a single date if Aviva wasn’t such a needy, clinging, paper towel. The only mistake I think Carole made was not running it by Heather first. I think if Heather would have known, she would not have felt so betrayed.
Good manners vs white trash an issue with this group……..HILARIOUS!
I agree with you Taco Tuesday (love that name!) The only mistake was that Carol was not able to talk to Heather first! But, who could blame Carole for wanting to get away and spend time with Russ? I am sure that Carole knew that if things got to intense with PT and Reid, she could just escape with Russ! I really do not think the dinner had anything to do with Carole wanting to spend special time with PT!
I think Sonja and Ramona should have been happy that Avivia was going to be elsewhere for an evening. I know I would have been. Heather and Luanne are different stories.