July 16, 2012 9:10 pm
REAL HOUSEWIVES OF ORANGE COUNTY
Season Seven Reunion Show RECAP
… by Sandi Duffy
Part 2 opens with the end of Gretchen and Alexis’ friendship. Snorefest. I hope it get better because last week’s part 1 sucked and so far so does part 2. They’re rehashing the Bunko party. Blah, blah, blah.
Then we get into the Fox 5 thing where Gretchen says she was offered Alexis’ job. Gretchen pulls out emails proving she was offered the job. That’s pretty hilarious. She actually printed out emails from Fox 5.
Gretchen claims that they told her Alexis sucked and wanted her to take the job. Alexis then says that Fox 5 told her that Gretchen sucks. I think we need the people from Fox 5. And for the record, I think they both suck. Then Tamra drops the bomb, asking Alexis if she still works there, and, of course, we all know she doesn’t. I know everyone hates Tamra, but like I said last week, she makes these reunions.
Ugh, now a Heather montage. Heather is ridiculously boring. Alexis must be taking English classes from Teresa on RHONJ. She describes Heather as Flaughy Tauty.
We are back to bow gate.
NOTE: It has never been proven that Sarah snapped off a piece of the fondant bow from Heather’s “Naming Care.” No pictures… no video! AND… no one saw her eat the tiny tasty piece! SugarRushSarah has been falsely accused! Railroaded and then ejected from the DO-BRO par-tay! Call Gloria Allred, Sarah!!
Oh is Sarah going to be on the reunion? Please. Please. Please. Damn, no Sarah.
FINALLY–a Brooks montage. I can’t believe this asshole has the nerve to get on stage. I so wish this show had been filmed after 20/20. Andy reads viewer mail that is all anti-Brooks. Brooks claims he didn’t know Vicki was on the show when her began dating her. I call bullshit. I think it is safe to say that everyone watching is calling bullshit. Even Andy is calling bullshit. If there were bubbles over his head they would say BULLSHIT in neon lights.
Now we have the Gretchen/Slade storyline. I think we’ve seen this before…in Season 6. Only this time, Tamra isn’t on the attack. Who would have thought that Gretchen looks like the smart one and Vicki the idiot? Even Andy practically calls Vicki a hypocrite.
Yay!!!!!!!!!! It’s Brianna! I can’t wait to hear what she has to say.
Brianna is pregnant and due in October. Andy calls Vicki a GILF. Andy is an idiot.
We find out Brianna and her husband live with Vicki, along with Donn. Vicki is such a friggin’ hypocrite. She made a deal over Jeanna living with her ex and now she is. Kind of like her making a deal over Slade not paying child support and then her boyfriend went to prison for the same thing.
Brianna reveals that Vicki was pissed when she found out Brianna was pregnant. Everything is all about Vicki all the time. Poor Brianna. I can’t believe she turned out normal. I want to yell at the television, “Brianna, move out of your mom’s house! What the hell are you thinking?”
I still love Gretchen’s reaction to Brianna getting married. “Does she not know who her mother is?”
I may be in the minority here, but I kind of think Brianna and Ryan just getting married in Vegas is romantic. I think big fancy weddings are stupid and a huge waste of money. And for the record, I did not have a big fancy wedding–just immediate family in my husband’s home…and I NEVER regretted it.
Brianna still hates Brooks. YAY!!!!!!!!
Brianna thinks Brooks is in love with Vicki, the Real Housewife of Orange County, not the real Vicki. I think Brianna is giving him too much credit. I think Brooks is in love with Vicki, I-am-so-desperate- for- a-man -I-am-willing -to-financially-support-him.
Brianna claims Brooks doesn’t try to get to know her. Vicki goes on and on about how this isn’t true. Brianna calls bullshit. She says Brooks never looks her in the eye. Tamra jumps in and agrees with Vicki. Apparently Brooks outed Brianna’s pregnancy and her other wedding (Vicki’s dream wedding for her daughter).
Even Andy chimes in with, “Doesn’t it bother you that he quotes lines from past seasons?” Brooks wouldn’t appear on stage with Brianna. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm………….interesting. Vicki thinks Tamra influenced Brianna against Brooks. I‘ve never met Tamra and I hate Brooks. Everyone thinks Tamra influences everyone else. Tamra’s not that bright. I don’t think she wields that type of power.
Brianna also reveals that Brooks has been around for a long time and still says that her mom had an emotional affair with Brooks for years.
Holy shitballs, Vicki reveals that Donn was having an affair for twenty years! And Brianna confirms it! OMG. Did not see that one coming.
Then Tamra reveals that after she left Cabo, Vicki called her and told her she woke up naked next to some guy. This is like the best Reunion show ever!
Gretchen calls Vicki out on all her hypocrisy. Alexis and Heather look like deer in the headlights.
Brianna is so the voice of reason. She explains to her mother, like she is two-year-old, why the other ladies have a problem with her…because instead of owning her own mistakes she projects them on everyone else. Even Andy says that in seven years Brianna has never not made sense. Brianna for President! OK, sorry, I got carried away.
Andy gets everyone’s final thoughts. They are all stupid thoughts. And I really can’t believe that Gretchen and Tamra are besties.