CAROLINE MANZO: DonCaro Will Be Albie Manzo’s Mommy Forever!!!…

This beautifully photoshopped cover of TIME magazine was done by SH reader “HousewifeHoe”… it deserves its very own space!!  

FEBUS to all.. and “Thank You” to HousewifeHoe!!  SH readers are the BEST!!!

NOTE:  Another funny takeoff on DonCar0… “CaronlinePesci” on twitter… HERE.

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249 comments on “CAROLINE MANZO: DonCaro Will Be Albie Manzo’s Mommy Forever!!!…

  1. OMG! LMAO!! I can’t stop. SH you are too too funny.
    Hey Caroclown oughta thankyou because she has never looked THAT good! I can’t stand another second of her stupid cliched fortune cookie wisdom or the way she dotes on her fat ugly loser ass airheaded lazy overaged brats. & Why do they keep saying AL BEE (hate that name) is so handsome. He is far from handsome! Zac Efron is handosme, Terrance Howard is handsome.
    Al bee is okay but no looker, & He is so obvioulsy gay, come on, Greg is his wife- the next wedding will be theirs & caroline will be nursing both of them. Lauren Manzo will get pregnant, shit out her lapband, gain 200 more pounds & marry Vito so she never has to get a real job. This family is pathetic & rediculous. I’d rather watch Mob Wives. They are really tough broads & really Italian not Italian like spaghettios like Caroline. & Gosh damn she uglier than homemade soap.
    Nene Leakes is not a beauty either but Nene has style & knows how to work with what she has got
    & pulls it off chic. Carolinebacker Manznose just looks like a Circus Vargas clown. YUK!

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  2. I have always thought Albie was gay. Since Caroline is such a favorite of Andy’s, he shoudl be offended. But whenever Joe Gorga comes on Andy’s show he is thrilled. Just like Albie is thrilled to be around Joe Gorga. he tries to play it too “cool” with Greg. he is not man enough to come out and say he is Gay. I wish that picture would go viral. It should be shown everywhere. I bet Andy would be terrifed to show it on his show or at the reunion. Caroline would wipe him out. Albie would run to Greg. I would love to know if caroline and Albie have seen it. That could give lauren something to tease Albie about and then tease Chris abut his weight. She should have a lot of jokes

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  3. If Caro’s Father in law was a mobster and her own dad went to jail–interesting how she was enraged about Danielle that she went to jail. Very interesting.

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    • I always knew about Big Al’s dad “Tiny” and the whole trunk, mob angle death thing, but CAROLINE’S father went to prison? Is this true?

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  4. I think that before the show most of these reality show housewives were actually nice people. If you watched the beginning of NJ housewives most of us started out liking Don Caro and most of the other housewives. In the beginning Caro seemed like the original Italian mama. She also tried to be the voice of reason and the person to go to when you had a problem. Even her boys started out funny and kind of cute. The nastiness didn’t seem to be so obvious. I have to say I really did enjoy the first one or two seasons. Now that they all seem to be faux stars and fake entertainers. They are no longer likeable. As they say sometimes fame can be a bad influence. It can change people for the worse. And in this case the Manzos have let it all go to there heads. Its not a pretty picture. As matter of fact it has become very ugly. I have seen people change when it came to there fortunes changing. They even have a show now on how the lottery has changed people for the worse. Seems like the Manzos have taken the ball and ran crazy with it. They have traded whatever morals and beliefs they supposedly had and sold them for the almighty dollar and fame. What a tragedy….

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    • I think it is perhaps the real Manzoids which we are currently seeing. Don Carlione and her kids were able to put on the nice act for awhile, but they couldn’t hide their nasty selves for very long. Looking back, there were more than a few clues as to what really was behind those fake smiles.

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      • I’m thinking it might be a little of both – they were never the fun, emotionally healthy, lovable family they pretended to be, but fame has undoubtedly made them worse. The way they’ve attacked Teresa shows their hubris has just gone off the charts. Whether you like her or not, there’s no denying she’s a popular figure now.

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      • I agree! I think season 1 was the Manzos *acting* like the perfect loving family! Kind of what the Wakiles are doing. I think once the viewers started loving them, little by little they let their guards down because they thought the views would have their back no matter what and whatever the Manzos do to anyone else is deserved, because they are perfect, moral people. I think they have always been judgemental and “we are better then everyone” kind of family. The kind of people that rip you apart the minute you walk away. I think since the Laurita family is so large they thought they didn’t need anyone else (outsiders). If you notice the Manzo kids mainly hang with their cousins. Lauren has no friends that aren’t related to her. Albie has Vito and Christopher had Kim Granny-tel’s son John, but that’s all we see. I dont count Greg because Andy made that happen.

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        • Belladee – Jacqueline said as much about the whole ” You don’t need to hang out with anyone but family ” thing in Season 1. She said it was ” difficult ” to be in that family, and they didn’t ” like outsiders” and thought no one in the clan needed to befriend “outsiders” when they had tons of family/cousins around them. They’re a WEIRD group. I come from a big family too, but we’re allowed to befriend “outsiders”, sheesh. IMO, it’s not about outsiders, it’s about CONTROL. Vito actually LIVED with Albie at Fordham, so presumably, they vetted him thoroughly early on – then um, Caroline decided he was “Lauren’s husband” ( she said this in season 1 -“I saw him and thought, there’s your husband Lauren!” so they’re OKAY with him ; Greggy also was Albie’s close friend at Fordham and he’s been angling to get his ugly mug on screen since season 1. He no doubt kisses Don’s a*s HARD and often to do that, so that’s why he’s allowed to be around. Also, we all know Andy Cohen’s love depends on not just being a decent person who supports gay rights, but having your very own fabulous gay to showcase on BRAVO, so having Big Greggy around is beneficial to them. Lauren too, is friends with Greggy. By the way, why the hell can’t Lauren seem to find her own friends or husbands? Albie sure has hooked her up, hasn’t he? Remember that ridiculous scene in season 2 when complained and cried not just because her brothers weren’t paying enough attention to her, but because they were now ” buddy buddy with Greg. Greg used to be MY friend too!” Um, he was ALBIE’S friend first – complaining that Albie and Chris were “now” better friends with him was not only a*sholey, but delusional. Yeah, little Jackie got uppity in season 1 telling secrets about the clan, but they seem to have her under control now! Ha.

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          • Also Don admitted in an interview that she picked all her kids up from school everyday even in high school. even in high school. EVEN IN HIGH SCHOOL. So that was a little telling. Also when she tried to defend what she said about Lauren what she actually ended up saying was soooooo worse IMO. No self awareness at all.

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            • My kids would never tolerate that…nor would my husband allow me to do that. She is overbearing!

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            • Not sticking up for Caroline at all because obviously I have a strong dislike for her but, Franklin Lakes kids go to Indian Hills Regional high school, which is in Oakland, so it would be impossible for them to walk home. They have to go on a highway (Rt 208) to get there, so walking home with friends is not an option. I know when your town doesn’t have a HS, they have to pay the other town per child to attend and provide busing. Maybe they had to pay for the busing and Caroline drove them not to pay? After hearing about all these abductions, even if I allow my children to walk to school, I will be following them with my car! LOL!

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            • I get what you are saying Bella but I just assumed that HS aged kids would catch rides with friends or drive themselves. Maybe there is more to the brother took sister too prom than just the too chubby for boys cover story. Shoot I know that wasnt true all the chubby girls at my school back n the day were some of the biggest sluts. Lauren could have got a date.. but momma wanted Albie to take her.

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            • If my only option was my brother, I would rather stay home and eat a couple of pints of benny and Jerry’s with my crazy aunt Jac! Lauren was probably the bitchy fat chick that get all nasty with you before you could make fun of her for being fat. I am sure her personality being worse then her weight was the main reason no one wanted to take debbie downer to the prom. I am sure there had to be some chubby chaser at that school! most chubby girls at my high school were know to give good b*&^ jobs

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            • The high school that they went to is ramapo high school off of Ewing Avenue. It is within walking distance of their house.

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            • Damn it! There goes my track record for always being right (hopefully none of you remember the other times)!!

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            • What I think was Caroline drove Prince Albie and christopher to school and she held a donut out the window and poor Lauren ran the whole way just for a bite of that boston creme. (Dear God, I am sorry for being so mean, but they aren’t nice people, so it’s ok, right??)

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  5. I haven’t seen or read anything about the Manzos responding to this picture, even cryptically. They usually respond in one way or the other. They’re totally ignoring it which I think is very telling. It didn’t garner even so much as a ” FEBUS ” ! I think it struck a nerve.

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  6. You are probably right. I guess when I started watching I actually thought that reality T.V. actually meant they were real people. Not! Shame on me for falling for it. It seems like so many of these people have become so jaded,fake and most of them have become the women they started out hating on. I mean look at Vicksvaporsmug..She started out right off jumping anyone new to the group. Everyone just assumed since she was the oldest she was more significant then the rest of them. Pretty sure being old doesn’t make you the smartest or the prettiest. It doesn’t give her the right to assume she is right about everything and everyone. Do you guys remember when BarbieAl came on? Vicksvapormug made so much fun of her being “Christian?” Now all the sudden She is the godly woman along with her sidekick BarbieAl…She makes me sick! I swear I keep thinking anytime now she is going to get struck by lightening…Seems like also she has become Wretchen too. She is dating someone who seems to be a clone of SlimmySlater.. She totally jumped Slimmy and Wretchen all the time about him being a deadbeat dad. My God out of the whole bunch of them she has become one of the biggest hypocrites. I wish they could somehow show Vic in the beginning and then split screen it to show all of the bull she now seems to be doing and saying . The stuff she jumped everyone else for saying and doing that she now is saying and doing. Way to go Syble (sp)….lol…

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  7. It seems that Caroline does not like anyone. But she loves her radio fans!! So I guess if she does not have to look at you and just give you advice she loves you. She blames everyone for her problems with Dina. Never liked her. Jackie is just being herself more that’s all. I know most people do not like her, but I like Kathy. Plus anyone that can make desserts like that I am not taking the chance just in case I meet her. And everything about her seems normal. Her kids, her house, and even her family. But Caroline is just mean. When she would not even attempt to be friends with Chris’ bestfriends mom. This was before the show, so that crazy Kim tried to be her friend before the show.

    Carolines father-in-law was killed. No one gets shot over 10 times and ends up naked in the trunk of a car. Everyone knows that the Manzo daddy was a low life for the mob. When she cried how it hurt her family to hear all those bad things about him. Especially the children. Then to say what she did about Danille. There could have been a horse in the bed and Caroline would have said it was just a mistake. They meant to cook it for the new cookbook.

    Danille may have been a lot of things, but a least she went out the same she came in. ANd I don’t remember her wearing the one shoulder look. That is worst than those tops the gals in OC were wearing for a few years. The ones with all the beading on the top of the shirt. I think there were about 6 and Bravo switched them out. And Alexis may be a pea brain, but she is still married and the other two are not. And does it seem that Vickie may have been going to the gas tank way before she said her love tank was full. And why should she not pay Don alimony. Just for him having to put up with her should deserve a few million.

    One more thing. I get bed-bound once in awhile and you guys have me laughing within a few seconds, always. Thank you all for being there. NOW TELL ME WHAT TFC and FEBUS mean. I have one working husband and two kids who live out of the house but have good jobs. Willing to give them up just to know. He even does the dishes without having to be asked.

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  8. Even the first season I did not like Caroline. I thought she was bossy and did not think her relationship with her sons, especially Albie, was normal. Then later, when a big deal was made about Albie’s learning disability, I got mad. My grandson has severe learning disabilites due to an error made at his birth, yet Caroline demanded special treatment for Albie. Turns out the school tested him and his disability was not as bad as Caroline wanted people to believe.

    She did not fool me, but Jacqueline did. I thought, even when Caroline turned everyone against Danielle, Jacqueline still was her friend so Jacqueline must be the kind of friend to have. Ony to find out. she will never stand up to Caroline. I did not like Danielle but could not treat anyone that way.

    Caroline taught Jac sons were valuable, daughters were not. A fat daughter is ugly but a fat son is cute. Caroline has both. Jacqueline threw her daughter out of the house for not working and sleeping late.. Lauren worked one day and quit because they didn’t respect her enough. Momma pays the bills for Albie and Chris. They also do not work but it is ok because they are invloved with BLK which they are being sued for. So now I see Jacqueline for what she is/ Just another low class Caroline. Lauren is on her way there also.

    Andy does not have the nerve to show or discuss that picture at the reunion or on his show. He loves the Manzos, especially Albie and the Gorgas, especially Joe. If Andy wants some drama let him introduce two of Caroline’s siblings she is not talking to (not Dina) as new cast members next year. Then bring danielle out with proof of Melissa begging to be on the show to destroy Teresa. That would be EPIC.. But Andy will never have the nerve, ever.,

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    • Christy that would be sweet. But I agree Andy would never do that. Or would he? What say you Andy? got nads?

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    • “Caroline taught Jac sons were valuable, daughters were not. A fat daughter is ugly but a fat son is cute. Caroline has both. Jacqueline threw her daughter out of the house for not working and sleeping late.. Lauren worked one day and quit because they didn’t respect her enough. Momma pays the bills for Albie and Chris. They also do not work but it is ok because they are invloved with BLK which they are being sued for. ”

      So true. Great post.

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    • Maybe Caroline was so critical of Ashlee because she was jealous that Ashlee was think and Lauren wasn’t. Ashlee has a big puffy face that would make people think she is chubby, but if you look at her body she isn’t. No matter what Don Caro thinks of Lauren, she still wants people to think Lauren is better than them.
      Oh how I would love for that all to go down at the reunion! I would want Danielle to make an appearance with all her back-up emails and watch Melissa talk her way out of that. after that I would LOVE for Andy to introduce there 2 new castmates for S5. Out walks Adele Laurita and another sister or brother’s wife Caro doesnt talk to. Maybe even Dina, but I don’t see her given it to Caro like a sister-in-law would and Adele and Dina don’t even talk. We know Adele hates Caro far more them Teresa and Mel, from not mentioning her in her son’s obituary. I have noticed that deaths usually bring people together, but not the case with this ice queen!

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      • Ashlee definitely has some positive attributes that Lauren sorely lacks – yes, THINness ( I know, Lauren’s working on that ) and TRUE and rather impressive creative talent. I suspect in combination with the general sh*tty start Ashlee got in life – loony teenage mom, even loonier grandmother around her all the time, father who abandoned her, mother not providing her with any stability AND being subjected to the a*sholeness that is the Manzo/Laurita clan, she never had a chance at emotional health. Caroline herself has told the audience like 20 times that she feels Ashlee should be ” more grateful” for all the Manzo/Laurita love/acceptance she’s received over the years. Does anyone ever tell their BIOLOGICAL child/niece ” you should be grateful I love and accept you like my own!” ?? She’s not one of them, and I suspect they never let her forget it. We’ve also seen them taunt her AS A GROUP on camera more than a few times. Then to top it off, her OWN MOTHER says NOTHING, just lets it happen, and even joins in! It bears repeating too that Lauren Manzo is no paragon of maturity or psychological stability either – She ditched her business ONE day after it opened because she wasn’t getting proper ” respect”! Caroline has intimated lots of times that this year was ” very rough” for Lauren and they were ” very very worried about her” and Lauren herself admitted she went to the hospital thinking she was ( at 23 ) having a ” heart attack” that turned out to be an anxiety attack. I’ve never had one, but I know ppl who have and they are no joke. Ppl DO tend to joke about them referring to a time when they simply over stressed and tense, but that’s not what an anxiety attack is. Ppl claim you really feel like your heart might explode and you might die. Plus okay, Lauren is( was?) chubby. Yes, as a woman, I’m well aware of how much pressure women feel to be thin, pretty, perfect, HOWEVER, this girl seems to really hate herself and think she’s like the ugliest person who ever lived and “maybe if I were thin, my mom would pay attention to me ” those problems are ALL CAROLINE’S doing, not society’s.

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        • And lets not forget that this business she bailed on ONE DAY AFTER was the same business that she was very piously smugly very caroline-like(FOR SHOW ONLY) ripping Ashlee a new one over getting that artwork together for. Knowing very well that every eyeroll Ashlee gave was well deserved except we didn’t know that yet.

          Dear Ashlee,
          I am very sorry. You knew it wasnt that pressing and certainly was not worth you jumping thru hoops for. But instead of calling her out on it you just took it and swallowed it and I am sorry you live in a family that makes you do that.
          Love, Made

          Dear Andy,
          Bring this up
          Love,
          Made

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        • ooops, I meant THIN, not think! Good point about how she has been told that she should be grateful that these people love you. They are never nice to her! What about Caroline having a problem with Ashlee’s message and twitter war with Danielle and pulling her hair, but her children can verbal attack and agressively get in Kim G’s face! I get annoyed everytime I see Albie, Lauren or Christopher snitching on Ashlee to Jac or Caroline, just so Jac can yell at her. It’s like Jac is too afraid to stand up to that family even if it’s for her daugther. Caroline hates that Teresa is not afraid of her. Look at how scared Kathy was when she went to caroline’s house to apoligize about what happened at the brownstone. Kathy needed to apoligize to Teresa for how she acted, not Caroline. Why is everyone so afriad of this fraggle!

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          • I dont know but I saw the same look of fear in Rosie when a caller called in saying Tree was controlling. Obviously Tree is not even close to controlling but you could just see Rosie’s thought bubble “caller must mean Caroline, oh crap what do I say?”

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            • just so odd how Kathy and Rosie were so nice towards Teresa on WWHL, ESPECIALLY Rosie who never skips a beat to insult Teresa (except to her face)!
              I also found it weird how Kathy was nicer during the field day and previous episodes, then I realized it was probably because they were filmed around the airing of the first episodes of S3. Like how Mel started off giving Teresa so many “passes” and letting things go or why JoGo started off the season bringing up what Teresa said about Melissa on camera and doing what he could to make Teresa look bad. There was so much hate towards Mel and Kathy when they first joined until Caroline and Jac embraced (or joined forces) with them. This is why those two keep saying in their blogs “you’ll see, just wait” to all the outraged viewers. They felt that when we all see caroline on their side all the viewers would start warming up to these two fame whores. Once Caroline switched teams so did all her fans. When they keep writing be patient you’ll see I thought maybe Teresa got caught doing something , but it was all about Teresa’s friends switching sides.

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            • Also the night of WWHL was also the finale of Celebrity Apprentice and Tree was on the winning team…by invitation.
              oh and someone had tweeted Lauren asking if she was in the audience and she said heck no or sumpin like that.

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            • how many episodes till this season is over? except for the posche fashion show which we already know about I havn’t seen the “you’ll see moment” is there something else or is the whole exposing MeGo as an stripper (which she was) the big bad thing? You think it would make Caroline happy, MeGo could give Critterfur advice on his carwash.

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            • I think it will run until september. But the you’ll see was after the baptism and fashion show last season when 100% of the viewers hated those too. Then Don Caro started making googley eyes with the Gorgas and wakiles and all the manzo fans “saw” how perfect these fame whores were

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    • Probably because she is a Cee U Next Tuesday who feels everyone must kiss her ring! (I still feel so low class and WT even though I didn’t come right out and type the word!)

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      • Families have their moments..but.to not go or be able to attend a nephew’s funeral…that’s pretty deep stuff I think. I read about that awhile ago. Sad.

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        • You’re not kidding. Deep indeed. Kind of makes her sing-songy family motto ” We fight big, we love big, we make up big!” that’s clearly meant to convey ” We’re just a normal family, with normal problems!” seem like utter bullsh*t.

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          • If I were not talking to my brother but his child DIED, I would go to the funeral! Really messed up that she did not go. No excuse.

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    • ANSWER: None of your comments have been deleted. Why are ALL of your “comments” questions?? You can find everything your are asking about by using the drop-down “categories” menu OR put a word or phrase into the “search” bar … both of which are on the right of this page. SH

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  9. If Ms. SH has a hall of fame, this excellent work by HousewifeHoe belongs in it. If not, may I nominate this soon to be classic as the first piece of work. It has brought a lot of laughs to all of us. Thanks again, HH.

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