August 14, 2011 10:30 am
Becky, the SH intern, was given the ultra-simple task of obtaining “BLK” water. Becky was given her very own Prius because she is apt to get lost and she can get lost longer in a hybrid. Well, it turns out that Becky did NOT get lost this time, but decided to stop and get a mani-pedi and do some shopping after she purchased the BLK water early in the day… Becky also stopped off at a hair-dresser friend and decided to let her friend change her hair color.
All while I’m waitin’ on gettin’ the BLK water in ma hands!!! Becky also forgot to charge her cell phone, so when she was taking much longer to get the BLK stuff to me, being a caring “boss” and all that… there was an APB out on Becky and the local LEOs got involved. An errand that should have taken approximately two-three hours took Becky fourteen!
Becky finally made it back, safe and sound… with BLK water in hand. (The following photos of Becky with the BLK water are re-creations as Becky actually rolled in after midnight and there was difficulty in taking photos at that time. The attempted photos were trashed as the blinding lights of the police escort that Becky received made the glare on Becky’s car look like a disco ball.)
OK, so let’s get to it! Here’s the rundown from our girl Becky…
Becky arrived at the supermarket which carries BLK water at approximately 1 pm yesterday. Becky reports that it was difficult once in the store to find the BLK water. Becky reports that she looked five times in the water section and could not locate the BLK water where she thought all water would be stocked. Becky gave up on searching the water section of the store and was on her way to ask one of the store employees for assistance when Becky spotted some eye shadow. Becky is easily distracted and spent over an hour at the makeup section of the grocery store, before remembering why she was in the store in the first place and after making her cosmetics selections, she continued the search for the BLK water.
Becky had to go to customer service, as the employees wandering around the store that she asked about the location of the BLK water had no idea what she was asking about… none of the employees ever heard of this mysterious BLK water. Customer service told Becky that, yes, the store does carry BLK water and she can find it in the “Organic Specialty Section.” The very nice customer service person actually escorted Becky back to the “Organic Specialty Section” as that section is a sub-section of the “Organic Section” and is kind of hard to find.
While walking Becky back to where the BLK water is stocked, the customer service person asked Becky, “You do know that this is BLACK water?” Becky tells the very kind customer service person that, yes, she is aware that she will be buying BLACK water. Finally, they arrive at the “Organic Specialty Section” and Becky picks up the six bottles of BLK water as instructed and heads to the check out… cosmetics still in hand and no further distractions.
At the check out, the cashier looked at the BLK water and said, “What is this?” and then asked Becky, “You do realize that this is BLACK water?” Becky replied that she was aware of that fact and was sent to purchase it. The cashier went on to say that she heard that this product was in the store, but that no one had ever come through her line with it and was certain that Becky is the first customer to have purchased BLK water in the months that it has been in the store. The cashier held up a bottle and asked fellow cashiers that were within earshot if they had ever seen this come through their check out line and they all agreed that Becky’s cashier is the first to have rung it up. Rung it up to the tune of $1.85 a bottle… that comes to a total of $11.10 for six bottles of BLK water.
Fast forward to today…
As Becky pissed me off so much yesterday… (I had to call in big-time favors from law enforcement friends because she was out shopping and trying to see how many miles the Prius could get on a full tank of gas)… she did not get today (Saturday) off. In preparing for the “tasting,” Becky procured various stemware, glassware and plasticware in which to pour the BLK water. Hey, Becky may not be the brightest bulb, but she will do just about anything I ask of her and she’s happy doin’ it… kinda reminds me of KimZ and Sweetie, ‘cept Becky don’t live wit me!
Well, let’s get to the reason for this entire post…
The first bottle of the chilled BLK water was unscrewed. There were three other people attending this “tasting,” plus Becky and myself. So including the always distracted, but lovable Becky, five people were in attendance for the unscrewing and tasting of BLK water.
Here are the initial reactions/comments:
- “No flavor, but flat.”
- “Stale swamp water.”
- “Heavy tannins.”
- “What did I just drink… Bane juice?” (This is some Batman reference…)
- “Left my mouth dry.”
- “Metallic aftertaste.”
- “There is a ‘heaviness’ to this.”
- “They don’t need to add anything to water.”
- “It would be worth the trip to return this.”
- “Oh, there’s a saying on the bottle when it’s empty!”
- “Tastes like water.”
Becky’s boyfriend came over to pick her up and take her home… and while here, he also tried out the BLK water. Interestingly, both Becky and her boyfriend had no problem drinking the stuff and actually LIKED the BLK water! It has to be an age thing as Becky just turned legal, same as her boyfriend. The others in the tasting party were over thirty… and all thought the BLK water was disgusting.
And what did SH think about BLK water??? Are you serious??? I ain’t drinkin’ that sh**!!!
NOTE: The leftover Skinnygirl margarita bottle was also put out. No one wanted to drink it…
Also Note: There is still a RHONJ recap to come… got sidetracked by this BLK water crap!