Real Housewives of New York: Alex McCord and Cindy Barshop… Buh-Bye!!! And, SH Poll Results!

                                Alex McCord                                    …and Cindy BarMitzvah (pictured                                                                                      in middle, uh, no… on left… uh, no…                                                                                     on right… oh, who the hell cares.                                                                                           She was a waste of a Housewife                                                                                             anyway…)   

Apparently, Alex McCord found her voice on the Real Housewives of New York a little too late.   Both Alex and Cindy Whateva have been asked to take off their Housewife aprons and get the hell outta the Bravo clubhouse… here.

“Eyewitnesses describe a “viciously angry” Andy Cohen physically “escorting” two Real Housewives of New York, Alex McCord and Cindy Hubcap, from his 47th floor Bravo office, to the elevator and actually push the ‘stunned and protesting’ Housewives through the entrance doors at 30 Rock and out onto the street.   Andy was heard mumbling “Those two were the worst Housewives ever” and “Who needs a Housewife whose name doesn’t make sense?” and “I’ve been waitin’ to show my manlyman side since those Housewives drove me to swearing on TV.”

The two Housewives who were kicked out of the building by Mr. Cohen, Alex and Cindy, attempted to re-enter the building several times, each time being stopped by Kathy Wakile’s sister, Rosie, who is now Andy Cohen’s bodyguard.  Rosie showed no signs of compassion toward the two ejected and rejected NY Housewives, even turning down a blatant bribe by Cindy CropTop, which was overheard by the shocked throng of people who just served as eyewitnesses to the incident, to “personally landscape Rosie ‘for life’ at Cindy’s opulent, super-swanky personal waxing hut in Quogue.”   Cindy’s “offer” was heard crystal clear by several people who were trying to enter the building “because they work there.”  Rosie was standing firm, taking her boss, Andy Cohen’s, instructions literally to not let anyone in the building “who even ‘resembles’ a goddamn Housewife.”   Rosie also turned down Cindy’s generous offer, telling Cindy, “Like, who goes to Quogue, man???”

It was later revealed that Andy chose Rosie for bodyguard duty as she only recognizes the Real Housewives of New Jersey as “real Housewives.”  Andy also was ‘delighted’ to find that Rosie has been his secret ‘twitterpal’ for over five years and is totally devoted to, in awe of and completely smitten with Andy.  Rosie’s bedroom is covered in “all things Andy,” and through Rosie,  Andy finally has uncovered the person who has been sending him various headwear (caps, hats, bowlers, cowboy, you name it…) weekly for the past five years.  Since becoming Andy’s bodyguard, Rosie has stopped sending Andy the headwear… she now just brings them in every Monday to work with her.  Rosie has happily remarked that since accepting the job as Andy’s bodyguard, she has saved $833.65 on postage.”

(NOTE:  The link also has an exclusive!  The Real Housewives of Miami will return for a second season. Well, who the hell didn’t know that one!?  SH gave that info months ago…)

(thanks to “Audrey” for the link!)

Speaking of the RHONY… SH readers have spoken.  The results of the SH poll asking if ALL the Real Housewives of New York should be replaced: