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Real Housewives of New Jersey Recap: Season 4, Episode 3… “Sealed With A Diss” Part I

 … “SEALED WITH A DISS”

Episode three of the Real Housewives of New Jersey starts with Rich Wakile asking Kathy how her night at the fashion show was… Kathy explains what took place at the Brownstone while Rich is slurping soup and talking.  Just eat your soup, Rich!  Kathy wants to have a sit down with Don Caroline.

Teresa Giudice Tree JOO-DICE… oh, no, sorry Tree, but SH is not accepting your attempt at a name change.  You’ve been pronouncing your last name ‘Joo-dice’ since day one of the RHONJ, so it’s sticking.  Tree JOO-DICE goes to a meeting with her ‘book people’ to review and approve photos of her new cookbook and talk with the people who are putting the book together.

Tree tells two women from her publishing company that when she was just married, she would buy cookbooks, but they had millions of “ingredientses” and she couldn’t make them.  And the recipes had things in them like “come-in.”  Yes, Tree JOO-DICE, cookbook ‘author’ just said ingredientses and come-in instead of “ingredients” and “cumin.”  Tree is a total idiot.  I’m sure that whichever bastion of higher learning Tree attended is proud of their alumni.  Oh yeah, it was the Berkeley School of Fashion Merchandising… never mind, they’re probably very proud of Tree, ’cause she’s a TV star.

While Tree’s at the cookbook meeting, she gets a call from juicy that ‘mysteriously’ goes dead… could the editors have dubbed in their conversation?

Lil Joe comes home in a bad mood and rejects Melissa’s affection.  Interesting that baby Joey in the high chair is wearing the same outfit as he did from episodes 1 and 2. Lil Joe is pissed that Melissa came home from the Posche fashion show looking all sexy, but she didn’t want to have sex with him.  Melissa goes over all the events at the fashion show… which is just talking again about the events at the christening.  Lil Joe saw juicy leaving the gym and they didn’t talk to each other.

Jackie visits a tarot card reader and makes a direct hit when she tells Jackie about her struggle with Ashley.  The psychic tells Jackie that her problems with Ashley will be going on for a while.  (Note to Jackie:  Your relationship with Ashley will have ups and downs for the rest of your life, so deal with it and send me the $500 that you would have spent on a session with that phony psychic.  I could tell you much better crap than she ever could and you could do it over the phone!  No need to get all dressed up to cart yourself to a psychic’s lair… think about it.)

Poor Lauren.  Don Caroline is sad ’cause her little boyz have moved into their apartment in Hoboken and Caroline is musing about her boyz being on their own in front of her only daughter, who is still living with Don Caro and Big Al, like Lauren is invisible.  Lauren gets back at Don Caro by informing her that she and Vito are going to get engaged and move in together. So there, Mom!  Hey, Albie and Chris, have fun with that stripper pole.

Jackie’s parents are visiting and she has a talk with her dad, Jerry, about Ashley’s problems because she came from a broken family.  Oh boo-hoo.  Ashley needs to have a limo pick her up so she can get to work on time and Ashley needs to have some plastic surgery because her nose wasn’t exactly right and Ashley needed to go totally blonde because that will boost her self-esteem and Ashley misses her little brothers in Texas ’cause one plays football real good and she can’t go to his games… because Ashley is from a broken home.  This segment just caused my eyes to mist up and tears roll down my cheeks.  The pain poor Ashley suffers day in and day out.  It’s almost as bad as poor Bethenny’s recollection of her terrible childhood.  Heartbreak and more heartbreak.

But, it was good use of Jackie’s parents on the show… and Jerry and Bonnie got a free trip on Bravo to visit Jackie in New Jersey.  Yes, Ashley needs her entire family’s help, ’cause she just doesn’t know where she fits in… oh, the heartbreak!  Chris and Jackie could help Ashley out by getting her a new car in the color that she wants instead of just giving her a new car or they could give her two new cars and a duplex close to her non-paying job at Lizzie Grubman’s, but even that could never erase the awful life that girl has to lead.  Ashley’s story is so sad…  (Note to Bravo:  No one is buying this scenario… get a better storyline for Jackie.)

Kathy Wakile goes over to Don Caroline’s with a huge bouquet of flowers to apologize for her actions at the fashion show.  And another rundown of the christening events takes place at Don Caroline’s.  Don Caroline basically tells Kathy that she’s not interested in hearing her story, to shove it and gives Kathy ‘head of the family’ advice, which is:  keep me out of your and Tree’s mess.  Now get outta my house.

Melissa gives the kids a bath and Lil Joe makes a sex appointment with her.

At Kathy’s…Kathy’s in the kitchen and says that she’s disappointed that her sitdown with Don Caroline didn’t go well.  Rich has a surprise for Kathy.. a white Mercedes in the driveway with a big red bow on it.  For no reason, just because Rich feels that Kathy should be treated like the queen she is.   Bravo must be getting more generous with their contracts.

Caroline, Teresa and Jackie are visiting Kim D’s, the owner of Posche Boutique, wholesaler to do some shopping and to show them where she gets her clothes for the boutique.

Tree introduces herself to the owner as have being involved in the fashion industry and then Tree also says that she’s an ‘author.’  Does Tree have any idea of how many real actual authors she just insulted by describing herself as an ‘author?’  Compiling a cookbook does not an ‘author’ make… I don’t care how many cookbooks you’ve sold to your ‘fans.’

Caroline tells the group about Kathy’s visit to her house.  Tree says that she wanted to find Lil Joe after the christening but couldn’t find him and it is suggested that Tree write a letter to Lil Joe… with Jackie’s assistance, ’cause Tree can’t write… she’s lucky she can read, ’cause she sure can’t speak correctly.  Let’s see how well Tree does at her letter-writing skills… this should be exciting.

Tree is at Jackies house to write the letter.  Tree says that she wants to put her thoughts down on paper.  (Note to Tree:  Definition of a letter:  putting thoughts on paper.)  As Tree reads her letter from her cell phone, Jackie points out that Tree left out mentioning Melissa in her letter.

Tree says the best line of this episode about Lil Joe and Melissa…”They’re both stupid.”  OMG!  Tree:  look in the mirror.  If there was ever a stoopid person who got lucky when they were cast on a realty show, it’s Tree JOO-DICE, not Joo-da-chay or Joo-de-che-ay.  Tree JOO-DICE:  YOU are STOOPID.

Tree drives off to Lil Joe’s, letter in hand, in her white Mercedes SUV with Jacqueline along with her.  Tree knocks on Lil Joe and Melissa’s door to hand deliver her letter, but they’re not home, so Tree leaves the letter stuck in the door.

Very conveniently, Lil Joe and Melissa were out jogging when Tree came to their house. Melissa asks Joe if he’s willing to never talk with Tree again.  Joe says that if she’s Tree Gorga, the sister that he’s always known, he’ll take her back with open arms…

Part II of “Sealed With A Diss” coming up…

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56 comments on “Real Housewives of New Jersey Recap: Season 4, Episode 3… “Sealed With A Diss” Part I

  1. Hi ladies!!! Is it me or Caroline is just so obnoxious? I was watching the scene where they are at the fashion wholesaler and she was just hateful, rollling her eyes when Teresa spoke. I am not a fan of Teresa but they all seem to now be annoyed with her because she is being more of her own person…not that she has much a personality cuz sayin come-ins instead of cumin….classic.

    • Well I’m not a lady but….thank you! I don’t remember her being so obnoxious before, maybe that was just in comparison to Danielle. But now Caro seems overbearing, demanding, complaining and just completely insufferable. Every scene she complains or dictates. Yes Caroline, you’re 5’1″, so yes, MOVE THAT plant. I cringe when she comes on screen.

      Is anyone else fed up with Caroline’s “the Brownstone is my house” attitude? Correct me if I’m wrong but doesn’t one have to pay to have an event at the Brownstone? And shouldn’t one be able to act as they like as long as they’re not destructive or breaking the law?

      Maybe Caroline has to play up the bitchiness cause without it, she won’t get much screen time and eventually will be cut?

      • Her comment, about if you need anything, let me know…I hang out with the owner! UGH!!! Tree just thinks she’s a big ol’ star!

  2. Melissa sounded just like Tree in the earlier seasons – when Tree kept talking about Juicy and how he needed sex all the time – the producers need to come up with original story lines – is that the same Mercedes they keep passing back and fourth :-) I never really cared for Caroline – I think she thinks she is soo much better than the other housewives

    • Vicky, I was a bit disturbed last night with Toey’s approach to begging/demanding/pouting for sex. Something about the way he said “look at me” in the bathroom scene was creepy especially in light of the rape allegations. I wonder if Bravo’s editing people knew about that? Just reminded me of the type of man that goes def when aroused and has a one track mind and listening to “no” aint on the agenda. And they talk nasty in front of their children. Very un-thank-you-Jesus like. At least Tree never done that… on camera. Ms Sh should have a field day with this re-cap. Cant wait.

      • MsMP, How about when he said he was filled with poison because of no sex? Who talks like that?

        • Click that part was manipulative at best. It was like he was giving a warning or something. Strange. Kinda like how Mel said he gave Tree “that look” This man has more issues than tissues.
          Tree sayin those people were stupid was only topped by her follow up about her being like God and more people should be like her. um tree that sorta thing didnt work for Camille or John Lennon so learn from their mistakes. I bet Catholics all over the country want to stomp a mud hole in both Gorga’s and Joo-dice’s.
          And whats up with the psychics? This is a running theme for bravo in every franchise. I bet these psychics are really producers and this is one way they get producer induced reality. Tree needs to sage? really? um hope she dont have to find it in the herb/spice section of grocery store. She would ask “Hey were youz guys keep the saggy?”

          • So, What did we learn from the tarot card reader? Jackie needs to kiss Trashley’s behind even more, because she’s a troubled young girl? IMO, she’s a spoiled, lazy BRATZ!!!

      • he is accused of rape??? omg what is bravo thinking and where do they find they low lifes – he does look mean i thought that fromt he whole christening thing – melissa is prolly an abused little girl because he reminds me of someone ruling with an iron fist

      • all the sex talk was just so strange. although it was cute when the daughter said “he wants to watch TV” but still very innappropriate convo to have in front of kids. They also seemed to use a lot of foul language in front of their kids which just doesn’t seem like an entirely healthy environment. I just couldn’t believe he said she needed to “roll over and drink espresso” i would DIE if my husband said things like that on TV! the zit thing? the bathing thing? weird weird weird

  3. Tree came over to Jackie’s to get help with her letter writing skills, while Jackie’s parents are visiting, then snubs her nose at any help, gets wasted, monopolizes Jackie’s entire day and won’t shut up? She is so rude and self centered! Why couldn’t she have spent the day with her “4 Beautiful Little Girls” doing math and things while she cooks that same tired red sauce and shrimp? She should’ve just let Gia write the letter, than to impose on someone, who has out of town guest? And why is Jerky Joe being so nice to her…without being asked repeatedly by her dumb self? “Don’t you love me Joe, huh Joe? “

  4. Last night was the most boring show I’ve ever seen. If they show Tree’s cooking “skills”one more time I’ll throw up. I never thought I’d say this but maybe Danielle needs to come back! Tree’s brother and family have made the show go down hill. Not fun anymore….

    • Scooter, When I saw that bowl of red crap at the photo shoot, I thought I’d throw up. “What honey? You want spaghetti for supper?” No! He just didn’t ask me that!

    • I agree and thought the same thing – i dvr’d it and fast forwarded through lots of scenes

  5. Click Click, don’t you think her brother is weid? His eyes look like he’s on something, but then again he’s Tree’s brother….

  6. Gorilla Joe is starting to freak me out. I’m watching last nite’s again and he’s creepy. Focused on wrong details that consume his lil world… on unhealthy levels, it’s sick! Has him missing out on what’s important. He puts his sons on a pedastool and treats his daughter like the help, he’s beating this Tree bid’ness like a dead horse with Missy. If I were her I’d tell him to get the F over it or make up with her bc I’m sick of talking bout it! or he’s hitting her up for sex like a gorilla in the zoo! Jesus Barbie Missy is a patient biznatch!…

    • Romo, I so agree on the way that little Antonia is treated! And she’a cute little thing. Oh No! Hope she don’t grow up and act like Trashley!

    • I’m with Romo and scooter. catching baaad vibes from Toey. very bad vibes. Not only treating the daughter like a second mother but refering to her as a C***blocker?!!? disturbing.

  7. Has anyone explained what Critter-fur said his new job was for leaving the Brownstone? We all know about Prince Albie’s BLK, BTK, KKK, KFC drink, but all we’ve heard is they got an apartment. I guess Critter-fur is to Princess Albie, what Slimey is to Wretched, a shlepper of their crap.

      • Vicky, He supposedly owned a “very successful clothing company” but rumor has it he is having financial problems. In a video of Princess Albie hawking his black water crap, Chris is in the back ground, I guess helping Princess Albie. You know, “My family is thick as thieves!”

        • While we’re discussing jobs: I’m curious what Creepy Joe Gorga does. You know… besides his cat-burglar gig.

          Has anyone else noticed that he dresses like a cat-burglar in EVERY scene?

          Working out? Dress like a cat-burglar.
          Eating dinner? Dress like a cat-burglar.
          Demanding sex? Dress like cat-burglar.

          It’s probably just because they don’t have many other clothes of theirs moved into that mansion that Bravo rented for them that they’re shown living in yet.

          And yes, I agree he’s got some kind of creepy, freaky attitude going not just with the way he treats his wife like a whore-slave (“I’m talking to you – look at me!” “when do I get a bath?”), but also how he’s so possessed with sex and absolutely SEETHING with bitterness at his sister as well as the disparity with how he treats his sons with how he treats his daughter. (Referring to his daughter as a “sex-blocker” was not cool, dude. Not cool.) As well with the weird way he’s convinced himself that “keeping that stuff in” is “poison” in his body. Semen is not poison, dude. It’s what creates your children. Look it up.

          Him getting enraged after it only being 4 days of not “getting any” was uncalled for. 4 days is not that long. Creepy G’s got some deep-rooted psychological problems.

          Melissa needs to run from him as fast as she can. Out of the three of them (Tree, Creepy G, and her) Missy seems to be the most normal. She may actually have some brain cells to salvage. But only if she thanks Jesus some more and starts running from that family now.

          Creepy G’s eyes are weird, too. I’m thinking some drugs might be involved too (judging from the dilated eyes, I’d guess meth, or from the enraged outbursts maybe ‘roids – steroids, not hemorroids, or maybe both, I don’t know.)

          The guy serious needs help. Sure Tree’s not exactly my favorite person and she’s as dumb as they come, but if this family has problems it probably stemmed from Creepy Joe’s weird attitude/bitterness towards his sister and/or sex/drug addiction and cat-burglar side-business.

          • WOW!!! Thank You MS.SH. I also read that Dina and Don Caroline have not spoken in mos. So Don Caroline is a big fraud and not that “Thick as Thieves” just a big ol’ screwed up family.

  8. Hey everyone…been away a few days due to bad summer cold…feeling better now…I stayed up to watched last night’s episode. Why? Why? Oh my…..

    1) okay it is obvious JoeGorilla is all about himself….what a complete jerk. He’s beyond creepy….No wonder he doesn’t like Tree….They are the same. Both self-centered and it has to be ALL about them. they want it their way, when they want it, and NOW…and if they don’t get it they pout and act like spoiled brats…Two people this self centered will never get along….I think he actually LIKES the drama. I think he WANTS to keep it going as it puts him at the center of his families attention (the whole poor, hurting Joe cause Tree is a bully routine)

    2) JackUh here’s a clue….there are * many* children who come from broken homes….and they manage to drive themselves to work everyday, yes they get jobs! …Gosh imagine that! Trashley has a mother, a father and step dad (also assuming step mom) …She has been blessed beyond reason and she still whines….She is just a whiner and whether from a broken home or not, a brat is a brat….For Jack’s dad to say “absentee father” in front of Chris was an “ouch”…seems he really cares for Trash and is trying to steer her (quietly and gently) but that poor man is facing an uphill battle with everyone making excuses for her….Sick of this. Go away. Why doesn’t Trash go live with her Daddy if she misses them so much? Oh wait, her mommy is on TV and if trash goes to Daddy she won’t get to be on TV anymore…oh whine whine….

    3) Tree. I fell over laughing when Don Caro told her to shut up and listen…HAHAHHA! Well honestly she needs to. I had a friend like that who went around and brought out all her drama, asked for advice, poo poo’d everything you said and did it her way anyway..gets old. Quick. dumped her. Don Caro is going to dump Tree too…The whole cook book pic segement…yawn…more stupidity. Over it.

    4) Praise Me–Doesn’t seem like she is all that into Joe now does it? But hey look at her and her house, her lifestyle…she gotta to keep da man happy or *poof*…..Seems to me she was looking for a friend to talk to and instead her gorilla man was mauling her…oh the things one has to put up with to live in a big mansion and have a lifestyle “most girls would envy”….

    5) Kathy. Dislike her. Wasn’t sure the first episode, I decided to wait and see although I was leaning toward dislike. It’s official now. Why is she going to Don Caro?? If she is so concerned why not talk to her family? Why not go to Tree’s house instead of Caro’s? She is definatly on Gorilla Joe and PraiseMe’s side….so I am not buying the whole “peacemaker” crap. Pot stirring bitch is more like it. Caro actually is right if you ask me. STAY OUT OF IT and let those two monkey’s deal with it..or not. Their choice. You can’t force people together…or to like one another, whether family or not.

    (oh and click click–I did watch Troop BH the other day! Love love them! Thanks!)

  9. Joee123, Missed you! Thought I’d have to send out Troop Beverly Hills to find you! Glad you’re feeling better. Loved your comment!

    • Thanks! I Loved the BH’s gang…..Oh my……is that dude really a “houseguest”? or or…oh nevermind….I admit all the blonde chicks looked alike and I had a hard time figuring out who was who…lol

  10. Wasn’t Toey engaged like “19 times” and for Messy #2, living that life style and keeping her man happy, isn’t that a gold digger?

    • Was he really?? Wow. Poor PraiseME, the thinks a hoe/fame/satchels of gold chick has to put up with….lol. When he was yelling at her when she was bathing the kids to pay attention to him…wow. that just spoke volumes…and his daughter is “blocker”? Not cool to say on TV dude. Not cool. PraiseME must be tired running around after 3 kids, cooking gorilla’s dinner everynight, etc. But seems she knew what she signed up for via her comments when we first met her (lady in the parlor/ho in the bedroom junk she spouted)

  11. Honestly I think Kathy brought the flowers to Don Caro because she was afraid the Don woulda had her whacked for the ruckus she caused at the Brownstone and for not showing the Don the proper respect in her house of business.

    Seriously, Kathy looked terrified going to Don Caro’s house. I’m thinking she knew she was about to be eyeball deep in some cement boots if she didn’t go kiss the boss’s ring.

    It looks like the skipper gave her pass. I don’t think Kathy will make those mistakes again, though.

    • LOL! Yeah she did look terrifed. I thought it was interesting how she said “you get one chance to make a first impression”…editing kinda made that a weird comment because it seemed like she was saying that about Tree…and I thought whooaaa dudette, she’s your cousin this isn’t your first impression! Then I realized she meant HER first impression on DonCaro..and she knew she blew it! I saw her blog on BRAVO and it had NOTHING to do with the show…all about summer safety…lol! Seems she is too scared to talk now! HAHAHHAA! Or maybe she will put up another one about the show later…After Don Caro tells her what she can and cannot write!

      • Yeah, watching scenes like that make me glad to live in Idaho! :) No Italian eggshells to have to walk on out here!

        Yep, Kathy was terrified, Caroline was pissed, and Kathy probably only got a “pass” because she’s Tree’s cousin (and possibly because they’re all on TV and it would be sorta obvious what happened, though I’m sure they have ways of making it happen). Ahh, to be part of the “family” out there…

    • Kathy brought the flowers ’cause Bravo stuck them in her hands as she was walking towards Don Caroline’s door.

  12. This was a wonderful blog MS SH, I couldn’t agree more, you hit the right points very well! Thank you.

  13. I actually thought that Melissa came off better in this episode. Part of me thinks that it’s all Bravo+Joe Gorga that is creating these issues. But who knows, they are all fame hungry..

    • She did come off a little better. But after seeing Toey and his peccadilloes in all their glory I think that that was the main reason Tree did not want him on the show. She KNEW the viewers and bloggers would rip him to shreds and Bravo would exploit his personality/mental disorders and she might have been trying to protect him from exposure. But PraiseMe wanted so badly to launch her singing career at all cost. That could definably cause a sister to resent a sil.

      • MsMP, Did you read all TrueKnight’s comments? He answered everyone’s comments. I asked him if he’d go to anymore events if invited, and he said only if Melissa was singing, then he talked about how great her singing was, and well, lost me. This is not a praise Melissa site or a promo site for her singing career. Check it out.

          • That same one about the e-mail. He was on here this afternoon and left about a dozen comments. Only Bitter Kitten and I responded. I only asked 2 brief questions, we just let him go at it. He almost filled the entire roll of avatars. Check it out.

            • MsMP, Blurred man on the chair. Sorry if I led you astray. Really, read all his comments, I could barely keep up reading them, he was posting so fast.

  14. If the Brownstone is Caroline’s “home” does that mean you when you visit her you get a bill when you leave her house? If she really cared about her business she wouldn’t have it plasted all over tv how disfunctional that whole bunch are. Last season Danielle and her crew showed what the business caters to. Next she might have Tree & Joe doing the cooking there/ food for thought Bravo????

    • Scooter, I’m still in awe how she is not even speaking to any of her siblings at all. Don Caroline is a big ol’ windbag LIAR! Then I went back and read the Laurita family tree post, and she only mentions Chris. They are not a tight knit family. Be gone Caroline…Before someone drops a house on you!

  15. Y a know Its been pointed out on this site about the awful way that some of the NJ daughters are treated in favor of the NJ sons. Well I concur and now we can add Kelsey Grammar to the list of jackholes how slight their daughters. Just read where he is only wanting custody of the son. Now I dont for one minute imagine that Kelsey will ever be successful in any attempt to gain custody but to have it documented or all the world and the courts AND HIS DAUGHTER to see goes to the heart of the brainlessness that is Kelsey Grammar.

    • MsMP, You notice how I give you the little s and MS.SH gets the big S? You are second in command. TeeHee! I think TMZ has 4 stories alone on Kelsey wants the boy and Camille can have the little girl. I don’t think a judge will seperate siblings, but then I don’t have millions of dollars, so who knows.

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