Real Housewives of New Jersey: Teresa Giudice… Juicy Says, “I Ain’t Guilty”…

Is this guy serious??? ‘Juicy’ Joe Joo-dice is planning on pleading ‘not guilty‘ to the fraud charges that were leveled against him when he appears before a Passaic County, NJ judge Monday morning.  How is Juicy gonna explain possessing a drivers … Continue reading


NeNe and Al… Uh, OK…

Does anyone really believe that Star Jones’ ex, Al Reynolds and ex-Real Housewives of Atlanta‘s Nene Leakes are ‘seeing each other’, ‘dating’, ‘hookin’ up’, whatever?  Come on, Nene… this is very disappointing, but no one ever accused Nene of being … Continue reading

Scary Island… Real Scary

Who can ever forget Scary Island?  The episode of the Real Housewives of New York when ‘Koo-Koo’ Kelly Bensimon was reported to have had a nervous breakdown, which Kelly herself later called a (cough, cough) ‘breakthrough?’

During a recent appearance, Bethenny Frankel-Hoppy took questions from the audience and was asked about Scary Island…

… and Bethenny did go into detail about it…

She says it was “SO MUCH WORSE” than what we saw on TV, and said that Kelly was experiencing “truly, in what seemed to her, producers and others as a complete medical breakdown, meltdown, she just needed professional help,” she said.

Andy swore to me that there would be no chefs at this villa; he’s trying to make me look insane.

Bethenny continued… producers placed security guards outside her (Bethenny’s) door, until they “removed Kelly from the Island.”  Bethenny also said that Kelly was “chanting”… one of producers is named Matt, and Kelly starts “chanting” Matt-matt-matt-matt, over and over, up in his face.   They were all freaked out, scared and worried about Kelly’s behavior and health.  They finally got Kelly off the Island the next morning.

Yeah, Andy, the island was great.  Let’s stop the bulls***… either I get my own show or I spill everything that went on during that trip AND I sue you and Bravo for attempted assault, malicious intent and I’ll even try attempted murder…

And, FYI… if anyone is following Bethenny’s new show, Gina no longer works for Bethenny.  Gina had undergone a partial hysterectomy and needs to take care of herself and other personal issues.  However, Bethenny speaks with Gina all the time.  Bethenny now has a nanny, not a live-in nanny, but she’s there 4 days a week, 8am to 5 pm.


Was Lynda Smokin’ Somethin’?

Mary, Stacie, Cat, Lynda and Messy… nice knowin’ you…
Lynda Erkiletian had proven herself to be the most interesting of the Real Housewives of DC… she ran a ‘modeling’ business, has a wonderful younger boyfriend, is into astrology, shooting clay pigeons, riding ATVs, cooking fried chicken and indulges in weed every now and then… but it takes more than just one HW to develop enough storylines for a second season.   Lynda recently talked with about coming back for season two and after reading her interview, maybe Lynda had imbibed in some recreational drug smoking beforehand:
Lynda and Ebong Eba… awww… say ‘bye’ now…

“There’s no official announcement,” said Lynda.  “There’s no way. [Cast member Cat Ommanney] is going on ‘Watch What Happens Live‘ on the 28th. One might wonder why [Andy Cohen is] having a DC housewife as a guest [if the show is canceled].”  (Here’s why, Lynda:  Cat has a book to sell.  Andy was at her book release party last month.   Andy probably invited her on WWHL as a consolation knowing that DC was not coming back, as she was looking at her book release to coincide with a new season of RHODC to promote her book sales, which aren’t doing all that great…)

Who and for what reason would someone want to start the rumor that the show was canceled? I think we certainly have people out there who like attention, thrive on it, make stuff up, and are habitual at it. So, my first thought was that a team who had something to gain, which is a firestorm, leaked it. I’m perfectly happy living my real life in the real world while negotiations are taking place. (Lynda, what ‘team’ would have formed to purposely ‘leak’ what everyone already knows… that the DC Housewives cannot pull off a second season without major retooling of the cast. Her reasoning just does not make sense.)

There are evil forces out to get rid of RHODC.  An evil team somewhere off the coast of Rhode Island is texting messages and emailing press releases about DC not coming back.  They are evil and are out to get me… us… everyone that lives in DC.

The show should be shooting by now. Is that true?
That’s not true. Basically, we’re four months on, four months of promoting and finalizing interviews, and that sort of thing, and normally four months off.   And when you say we’re supposed to be filming right now, we’re obviously filming when we’re supposed to be filming. And if we’re not filming right now, that means we’re not supposed to be. It’s just craziness.  (Huh???)

How do you feel about the reports that your show failed in the ratings?
The thing that I really hated about what was going on yesterday was that people kept talking about the ratings. Our ratings were double, triple what Bravo had anticipated. Our ratings, basically as I heard it from Bravo and [the show’s production company] Half Yard, we were only second to New Jersey as a freshman show. Our first episode had 1,700,000 or 1,600,000 viewers. Beverly Hills didn’t have that on their first episode.
So, the idea that people were saying we were terrible in the ratings? We weren’t. We exceeded everyone’s expectations. We knew that the [White House] incident may affect our viewership and some people wouldn’t want to watch. So, we came from a disadvantage and we managed to run over a million viewers for every single episode.  I was very proud of our ratings considering the circumstances, but most importantly because we were a new show.
Hey, Bobby Trendy… where’s the weed?
Some viewers felt your season wasn’t entertaining enough. Why do you think they feel that way?
I think the reason that happened was we only had nine episodes and I believe that what occurred was that much that we had was posted on video, because Bravo had no choice but to showcase what led up to the White House incident. They had no choice, but to allow that to unfold. So, by tweaking two plus episodes, they cut a lot of material that would have shown people to be much more interesting than they were. It’s not that they’re not interesting, it’s that you can’t show a snippet of a story and not follow it to the end. In production, you have to follow it to the end.  There were tons of material that Half Yard and Bravo just weren’t able to use primarily because everyone wanted an answer to the White House incident and Bravo had to give it to them.
If you were to go on to a second season, what can the viewers expect?
I think that there are some dynamic, incredible women in Washington and you merge women and Washington and you’ve got a great second season. And I hope the fans and the naysayers will give Washington the opportunity to really show itself for what it has.  (Um, excuse me… Lynda… Bravo merged women and Washington the first season and it tanked… that’s why there will be no second season.)

Real Housewives of New Jersey: Teresa Giudice… Juicy Joe Arrested at Home…

Well… we all now know what Juicy is doing this weekend…

Juicy is in deep, serious trouble and they want him kept in jail… Tree needs to come up with $50,000 straight, no percentage bail money will get him released.  Wonder if she kept her cooking demonstration/book signing engagement at Mt. Airy Casino she had scheduled for tonight…

Goin’ to the big house…

“Passiac County Prosecutor Camelia M Valdes announced in a release that Giuseppe Giudice, husband of “The Real Housewives of New Jersey” cast member and Montville resident Teresa Giudice, was arrested at his home in Towaco on Friday for fraudulently obtaining a state driver’s license.

“Mr. Giudice was arrested at his home earlier today as the result of an investigation this office did with assistance from the state Motor Vehicle Office,” Chief Assistant Prosecutor Jay W. Mc Cann said.

According to the release, Giudice, 40, allegedly obtained a driver’s license from the Patterson branch of the Motor Vehicle Office using his brother’s identifying information in June 2010.  Giudice’s license was suspended at the time and still is, according to the statement.

Giudice is charged wrongfully using ID of another person and forgery and, if found guilty, could face more than 10 years in state prison, according to the release.

Mc Cann said that bail is set at $50,000 with no 10 percent option.

The arrest was made by members of the Passaic County Prosecutor’s Office Financial Crimes Unit with assistance from the Montville Police Department.”

NOTE:  There has to be something else going on here for the police to dig this deep to find something on Juicy to arrest him.  Law enforcement doesn’t normally spend the day researching citizen’s drivers licenses and the documents used to obtain them.  (Juicy used his brother’s birth certificate and marriage license.)  He’ll get out after Tree arranges his straight $50,000 bail money, lawyer up and get this charge reduced.  The County’s Office of Financial Crimes was in on this, so could it be connected somehow to the Joo-dice’s ongoing bankruptcy case???

Source… here.

Shana/Taylor’s Therapy Being Filmed… Russell Reluctant

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills beauty (everyone is entitled to their opinion…) Taylor Armstrong and her husband, Russell, showed signs of strain in their marriage on the Bravo hit show and now has exclusively learned the couple is in therapy.  Audiences watched the first season of the show as the pair seemed to become more disconnected and a source close to the situation (Shana/Taylor) tells that the couple is trying to work through their issues with the help of renowned psychiatrist, Dr. Charles Sophy.

And while the couple takes steps to repair the breakdown in their marriage, we’re told several of the sessions with Dr. Sophy will be filmed for the upcoming season Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, although Russell is not quite as receptive to the cameras as Taylor.

                  “He’s so much different at home without the cameras.”  

“Dr. Sophy has seen Taylor and Russell together, and separately.  Some of Taylor’s sessions with Dr. Sophy will be filmed and featured on the second season.  Russell hasn’t decided yet if he wants to participate on camera.  Russell comes across on camera as being very aloof, and reclusive, that just isn’t who he is.  Russell wants to work to improve the marriage, it just isn’t Taylor, which is a very, very good sign for the future of their marriage.”

                                              I will go anywhere, do anything as long as it’s photographed or filmed, but you are required to publish all images.  If my projected goal of making people think that I am everywhere at all times is not met, I will consider a sex tape; however, Russell is camera shy, so I will be auditioning older, silent guys for his part.

The Armstrong family also welcomed a new addition into their home and their daughter, Kennedy, couldn’t be happier about it.  “Last season, viewers watched in horror as Russell bought Kennedy, a puppy, named Snowball. Yet, Kennedy was extremely allergic to the dog, and Taylor decided that Snowball had to go. There were a lot of feelings of anger because Taylor felt that she was the bad guy for giving the dog away, and Russell hadn’t consulted her before buying the dog. They wanted to get Kennedy another dog that she wouldn’t be allergic to. They recently adopted a Chihuahua and named her Jax. Kennedy isn’t allergic to the new dog, and she loves having a puppy in the house,” says the source.

Source:   here.

Real Housewives of New Jersey: Teresa and Joe Giudice… What’s Juicy Doin’ ?

Last week, the scammer/bankruptcy queen who still appears on the Real Housewives of New Jersey, Tree Joo-dice, heard some talk about Juicy having a very private dinner with a younger version of herself and she immediately took to her Fake-a-licious Fabulicious site to post that she and Juicy are more in love than ever… quick, grab me a bucket!

When you leavin’, Tree?  You don’t wanna disappoint yer fans… howz about leavin’ now, just so ya git there in plenty of time… naw, Tree, two days won’t be too early…

Anyway, out of curiousity, just rechecked her site to see if she had posted any further gag-inducing ‘love, love, love’ crap about her and her million-dollar bankruptcy buddy and found that she and Juicy are off to a mini-honeymoon in the Poconos.  Or so I thought.   Tree is actually off to the Poconos by herself.  According to her schedule, she will be cooking her mother’s recipes from her latest cookbook and, of course, staying to sign books for the nitwits that really think that her book is somehow unique… probably the same people who actually paid to sit in the audience at the Learning Annex where she gave advice on how to live.

So what if I took Bethenny’s ‘skinny girl’ idea… you have to read my cookbook… you can’t read a drink, Danielle.

Since she wrote her rebuttal to the Juicy-being-seen-out-with-a-cuter-Tree rumor, there has been no mention of Juicy on her site.  S0… where’s Juicy gonna be while Tree’s at the Mt. Airy Casino pumping these poor individuals for their cash?  Out with Tara D or G or F?  Why do the rumors about Juicy hit a distinctive nerve with Tree?  Maybe someone who is familiar with Juicy could speculate intelligently about Juicy’s activities.

                                                     …yeah, I changed it to: “Happy Wife…Goodbye Happy Life”   NO!  He’s just kidding.  Right, Joe?  Ain’t that right, Joe?  Joe?

So, here is what Joe Mastropole, Juicy’s ex-business partner who was almost screwed out of over $500,000 in the Joo-dice’s ongoing bankruptcy case had to say about Juicy and his private activities:  “i am not surprised joe is fooling around that will never change nor will his getting drunk and acting like a 20 yr old some people never grow up and can never do the right thing by anyone  not a partner wife or friend    he will rot in hell.”

Well said, Joe… well said.

Tree’s Rebuttal Post:   HERE

Thanks to Joe Mastropole…

Kelly’s Losing It…

Poor Kelly!  This really is not my style of post, but ex-model Kelly is always so full of herself, I just couldn’t resist.

She is running a very weak third in the race between Julie, Tinsley and Kelly in one of TMZ’s disgusting poll questions, ‘Who’d You Rather’?  If you’d like your vote to count, click on the ‘source’ link at the bottom…  Wonder why she’s doing so terribly in the poll???

From TMZ:

Julie vs. Tinsley vs. Kelly: Who’d You Rather?

Former “Dexter” beauty Julie Benz, 38, socialite Tinsley Mortimer, 34,and “Real Housewives of NYC” enigma Kelly Killoren Bensimon, 42, all lounged around at the same event in NYC on Tuesday.  (Dontja love it that Kelly is described as an ‘enigma’?)


Question is …

Who’d you rather?

  • 46%  Julie
  • 44%  Tinsley
  • 10%  Kelly

Total Votes: 90,065


Nene and Shana/Taylor… 14:59

When will their 15-minutes of fame end?  Real Housewives of Bevery Hills‘ photo-bomber Shana/Taylor Armstrong was out last night with Real Housewives of Atlanta aspiring celebrity Nene Leakes… they had dinner and then for a weird photo-op, held hands as they exited.  If only Nene would have been caught holding hands with Al Reynolds…

NeNe Leakes Heads To Boa With Taylor ArmstrongCome on, Nene… I can show you how to change your name, get new ID and scam your way into Bravoland.   But, I’m already on Bravoland.  We’ll bleach your skin and you’ll fit right in with those Jersey girls…


…before you get to Jersey, Nene, you gotta downsize the booty pads…

Quick Picks with Andy, Sonja and Danielle…

The girl that gave everyone a semi-tour of Ramona’s apartment ( is back, but this time she’s playing ‘Pick One’ with ex-Real Housewives of New Jersey cast member Danielle Staub (uh, why?), Bravo Big Boss Andy Cohen and Real Housewives of New York‘s Sonja Morgan.

Andy’s pick of Aniston?  What is wrong with him???

Kelly Bensimon on Meds…

The Real Housewives of New York will begin their fourth season in less than two weeks and we all know the frenzy that happens when a Housewives franchise is about to commence a new season… the cast is in hibernation until that anticipatory time, which happens in spurts around the month before airing and then they will all come out to talk with any media source about anything.   However, the ever-diligent Kelly ‘Koo-Koo’ Bensimon likes to make sure that she is scorched in the minds of RHONY viewers by issuing original videos of educational value.  Here’s Kelly taking drugs her flu medicine:

It’s All About Andy…

Bravo insiders are snickering about an expensive ad campaign green-lighted by network president Andy Cohen hitting New York buses, phone booths and taxis — featuring the perma-tanned face of, you guessed it, Andy Cohen.

I made those Housewives, so this time it’s ALL ABOUT ME!  ME!  ME!  ME!  I approved the ad campaign, so it’s all about me!

One told us, “It’s all about Andy Cohen. Even though Season 4 of ‘Real Housewives of New York’ is about to start on April 7, the ads to promote Cohen’s show, ‘Watch What Happens Live,’ are all over town.” A Bravo source said the campaign will appear here and in Chicago and was green-lighted by the marketing department.  Bravo declined to comment.


NYC Transportation Photos:  Courtesy of AL

Elaine Lancaster, ‘Lost’ Miami Housewife Dishes the Dirt

James/Elaine… did Miami lose out by dumping Elaine?  Uh-yeah!

James Davis aka Elaine Lancaster, the ‘lost’ Miami Housewife (Elaine was scheduled to be a Housewife, but was pulled at the last minute) spoke with Maddy Marr of the Miami Herald about all the Real Housewives of Miami… he likes Lea, but that Crispy Rice chick doesn’t bring much to the show; he also says that Crispy was a reject from Basketball Wives…  he snarks on them all:

Gretchen and Slimey… PR Time

Awwww… cute!  They’re going to go on the Brad and Angelina plan for kids…

On the Real Housewives of Orange County show’s fourth season, Gretchen Rossi was branded a gold digger for dating the much older Jeff, who was dying of cancer.  Now Gretchen Christine is snuggling with Slade Slimey Smiley, a guy who’s been around the block with the O.C. Housewives:  He was engaged to Housewife Jo De La Rosa in the show’s first season and had a previous rendezvous with yet another Housewife, Lauri Waring.

Both Gretchen and Slade have such a bad rap from their appearance on RHOC, it looks like they are trying to improve their image with interviews such as this:

REAL HOUSEWIVES OF ORANGE COUNTY: Where is Bria Peterson? … Daughter of George Peterson Still Missing…

WOW!  This story just keeps getting more mysterious as days go on… if Bria is safe, let her contact her mother, Gina…

​”Where is Bria?” reads the Facebook status of Gina Peterson, who calls herself the “Real Ex-Housewife of Orange County.”

Gina, ex-wife of former Real Housewives of Orange County cast member George Peterson, alleges that their 14-year-old daughter, Bria Peterson, has been missing for two and a half months following years of verbal and physical abuse from George. The story is both convoluted and hazy–Gina has not filed a missing-persons report, as she says the police have “been on his side too many times to count,” and Bria’s stepsister, Ashley Zarlin, claims that Bria is safe and being kept away from Gina and her “destructive behavior.”

Believing that she has been “slandered, stolen from and lied about” for nine years, Gina has turned to Facebook and Twitter to plea for help.


​George could not be immediately reached for comment.

Bria lives in San Juan Capistrano with George, an Irvine real-estate tycoon, and her stepmom, Lauri Waring Peterson, one of the original Housewives on the Bravo series. According to Gina, on Jan. 7, a friend drove Bria to the Newport Beach Police Department, where she spoke to investigators about the abuse. She was sent to the local shelter Orangewood Children’s Foundation in Santa Ana.

When George found out, he also spoke to investigators and convinced them Bria was lying and needed therapy and was able to get Bria released from the shelter and back in his custody, Gina says. That night, Bria went missing.

“She told me she’d rather go to foster care than be in a house with him,” Gina said by phone.

Gina Peterson’s Facebook Page

Gina and George’s 16-year marriage ended in a messy separation in 2002 and subsequent divorce in 2004. George was granted full custody of their four youngest children, McKenzieSlayteDanyka and Bria. “It became a war from the gate,” Gina said. “He wanted full custody of kids that he didn’t want, kids that he tore down every day. It was about not wanting to pay child support. They had dollar signs over their heads.”

In 2008, George filed a restraining order against Gina, claiming she had threatened to kill him and has a history of violence against the children.

Gina, the onetime girlfriend of former NBA star Dennis Rodman, maintains the children are being abused by George and posted to Faceook an email supposedly from Bria, dated Dec. 17, 2010, with the subject headline, “MOM PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!”

Mom please HELP me!!!!!!!! I need out i cant take it any longer!!!!
Now that he has kicked Danyka out of the house he is going in a little pattern he went from abusing adriean to brain washing mackenzie to abusing slayte and danyka and now to me. He already does abuse me. he gives me bruises i have 5 recent bruises from him from last sunday. 3 on one leg and 2 on the other he just came in and i was texting and he wanted to know who i was texting and i didnt tell him so he tackled me and was laying on me so i couldnt move and he was crushing my chest and i was telling him i couldnt breathe and he said”oh well u were born like that” and just started punching me in the legs and giving me “charlie horses” and digging his knuckles into my collar bone saying hes making a wish and i was crying and he still wouldnt stop. and when he would hit me it would leave welts from his rings and bruises. I would send them to u in email but they r on my phone and its too risky to send bc he reads all my texts and stuff on the computer some how.
. . .
He is very verbally and physically abusive and just calls me all sorts of names and says such horrible things to me to make me feel horrible. For an example he says the same things to all of us girls he calls us all sluts and whores and how we have so many diseases from guys and he wouldnt be surprised if we r pregnant.
. . .
I just want to be happy and live with you. i want to talk to people so i can get out of here. Im really scared to though bc im scared like what if i do talk to people and they let me live with u but i have to come back here for a lil then he will just be mad and probably beat me and just make my life miserable…..even though it already is. Im truly scared of him and after the things he has done to all of us, i do not count him as my dad. He likes to make everyone to believe that he is this great dad and he will beat us and then run to the schools and lie about us his own kids to make us seem like we r the bad kids and he is just discipling us. he tells the school that i date 30 year old men and always teases me about and i dont know why but its the same he did to slayte and danyka. He told people slayte was a horrible kid so he got sent away and danyka was crazy so she went to the mental hospital but really HE is the crazy one! Hes trying to put all of us against each other. Please help me and get me out of here im BEGGING YOU! i need your help. I love you

Gina also posted this photo of Bria’s bruise, which she allegedly received from her father.

Gina Peterson’s Facebook Page

However, Ashley Zarlin, the daughter of Lauri, who lives with Bria, has tweeted that Bria is safe.




​Gina says she is not stopping her search. “I’m doing this because I promised my child that I would go to all lengths to protect her,” she said.


Alexis and Jim… Ugh and Ugh-er!!

After watching the latest episode of the Real Housewives of Orange County, the image of the despicable, disgusting, detestable Jim Bellino blessing his wife and kids enveloped my brain and I could think of nothing else except how I loathe him.  The two-car, stuffed-with-luggage ‘family’ outing to San Diego was just excessive and depressing.   How wonderful of this ‘Christian’ dad to lay a ‘blessing’ on his son and then reject the little boy when he asks to ride in the same car as his dad…  luggage or my kid… yeah, I’ll take the luggage. Nice going, ‘Christian’ Jim.

Rancho Bernardo InnAlexis thought that she was packing for Mexico… yeah, she doesn’t read the  small print…

Alexis is no better… she’s a total idiot.  The resort they visited in San Diego is less than an hour’s drive from their home and she felt the need to actually go out and buy more luggage for the ‘journey,’ and, of course, she has to have a nanny come along… because how in the world will she be able to handle three children by herself?  Three!  Three kids is just too much for Alexis to handle… after all, she IS Jim’s best accessory and has to stay that way, so these kids (that are also Jim’s) better learn quick that they are just accessories and are in for a lifetime of ‘get away from me, kid… you’re bothering me‘ from both Alexis and Jim.

After failing to even acknowledge his little son while passing him on the highway to the resort, they arrive at their destination and moron Jim insists that his little boy help gather all the luggage that Alexis brought and stand by it.  Jim also insists on humiliating Alexis in front of her kids and resort employees by making her also pose by the luggage so that he could get a digital image and probably make Alexis look at it now and then when he feels that she needs a humiliation reminder.

HW-15.jpgFive years from now:  Alexis will smile when told by Jimbo to stand by the luggage. Little James will be nine and have run away so many times that he’s required by Orange County Court to wear an ankle monitor… as soon as he hits 18, he’s gone.

They settle down at the resort… Jim actually takes little Jim/James whatever out to fly a kite and the nanny takes the twin girls so that Alexis can sort out the contents of the luggage, which overwhelms her.  Imagine Alexis unpacking WITH her twin girls, she’d be in nervous breakdown territory.  Alexis also wonders when there will be ‘alone’ time with Jimbo…

HW-12.jpgI conked little Jim/James whatever and the other two out just like you asked Jim… can we go now?   Huh?  Please???

Oh, finally, they get some ‘alone’ time and Jim and Alexis buzz right over to a local LaJolla jewelry store (’cause where else does one go when they want ‘alone’ time?) where Alexis is drolling over an 6 or 8-carat diamond ring.  Jim tells Alexis that she should know that wearing the 6 or 8-carats would ‘harm the children’ and proceeds to ignore her to focus on a watch which is priced at $20,000.  Jim is a real bargainer and strikes a deal with the jeweler… he buys two watches for $27,000.  How in the hell does Blimbo do this?  Did he really buy them?  Or was this a producer-induced scene to further humiliate Alexis?  Interestingly, Alexis did not see this trip to the jewelers as demeaning or humiliating to her, as she is ‘Jim’s greatest accessory’ and he surprises her with jewelry all the time when the cameras aren’t around.  Oh, puh-leeze Alexis!

HW-10.jpgAlexis, babe… I told you before that real diamond rings are considered lethel weapons.   You did?  Yeah… they’re considered lethal weapons… the ones I surprise you with are CZs…

HW-11.jpgYou’re not serious about my rings being CZs… are you, Jim?  Jim…???  Uh, Alexis… I care about you too much to allow you to walk around with a lethal weapon on your finger, OK?   Now watches are the Lord’s wrist protection and He wants me to have two of them…


In real life, their house was sold in a short sale last week:   Where are they living?  How are they going to keep up this totally fake lifestyle?  They have already downsized their nanny brigade, but what will happen when they cannot afford the one nanny they have left?  What will happen to their three kids when the nanny isn’t there any longer?  We’ve already seen how well Alexis handles her mommy role when she’s forced to interact with her children, which is disasterous… the twin girls in reality almost died this past summer when their stroller rolled into a swimming pool while Jim and Alexis were chatting and not paying attention.  (Eyewitness accounts: ).

HW-09.jpgMr. Jimbo, you tol me joo yust had one seat lef in dey car and joo tol me to put dey other lil girl in dey trunk… don joo remember, Mr. Jimbo?  Oh… you funny!

When is Alexis going to stop making excuses for the creepy imbicile that she married?  I wondered how they actually met and why she married him… well, I know why she married him and that scenario is falling to pieces, so how DID they meet?

A little background from an interview that Alexis gave to the OCRegister in July 2009:

Orange County Register:Did you audition for the show at a casting call? They had one at South Coast Plaza, and a lot of women showed up.

Alexis Bellino:No, I did not. I’ve known quite a few of the cast members from social events and the Newport Coast circle. Gretchen (Rossi) and I have run around in the same circle of friends for the last few years. I’ve seen her at the last few events.

OCR:What are your thoughts, now that you know you’re the newest housewife?

AB:I’m pretty excited. It’s an amazing opportunity.

OCR:What do you think of the show?

AB:I’m an addict. I watch every single “Housewives of Orange County.” I’ve always been very aware of it, very into it.

OCR:Where were you born? Where did you grow up?

AB:I was born in Hannibal, Mo. That’s where I grew up my whole life. Kansas City is an hour and a half west. St. Louis is an hour and a half south. Mark Twain and his stories, that was all about Hannibal. As someone from the Midwest, I do feel like I have a little bit of a different value system. We’re kind of old fashioned. But once I got off the plane in San Diego and Orange County, I discovered that I’m a California girl at heart.

OCR:How long have you lived in Orange County?

AB:Five years. Eight years in Southern California.

OCR:What does your husband Jim (47) do? How did you meet him?

AB:He’s an entrepreneur. He does “spec” building: He finds a home that needs fixing up, he buys it and flips it. He also does pawn loans. He got his pawn license. He used to own a pool-table business. That was an $8 million-a-year-profit company.  We met in Palm Desert, at the Desert Springs Marriott.   We haven’t spent a day apart since.

OCR:Was it love at first sight?

AB:Maybe. I was a little harder (to convince). I was just getting out of a relationship (her first husband). Once you’re divorced, you never want to get married and divorced again. He was persistent but not overbearing.   So I fell in love.

OCR:How long have they been shooting you at home with your three kids (James, 3, Melania and Mackenna, both 20 months)?

AB:For a couple weeks, a few weeks maybe. They’ve been shooting at the house and at some of the other women’s homes. We all went to the mall, South Coast Plaza, and shot there.

OCR:What has it been like meeting and interacting with the other ladies? There has been some drama with the new housewife in previous seasons.

AB:It has been amazing. I already knew Gretchen. Lynne (Curtin)’s a sweetheart. She doesn’t have a mean bone in body. Vicki (Gunvalson) and I joked and laughed and had a good time. But there’s drama anytime you get five women together.

OCR:Wasn’t Vicki a little reserved or cautious about meeting you? She’s been like that with the newest housewives.

AB:I sensed some reservations. But I didn’t feel afraid or timid or anything like that. Even if there is drama, I haven’t experienced it yet. I’m still getting involved with all the women.

OCR:What do you think about giving up your privacy?

AB:It’s always a concern I have. We live in a gated community. But we’ve always been out and about. We know five or 10 people in a restaurant when we go out. We’re always out on the social scene. We don’t stay home a lot.

OCR:Are you nervous about how the show is going to portray you when it airs?

AB:Yeah, I’m a little nervous about how the show’s going to portray me, of course. But anything to help me be a better person. The cameras are going to be right in front of my face. I’ll try to be the best person I can be.

OCR:What do you hope to get out of the show?

AB:I have been a stay-at-home wife and mom for five years, and I’m now ready to have something on my own outside the home. This show is perfect because it is an interesting and fun outlet for me, but it still allows me the opportunity to spend the majority of the time with my husband and kids.

OCR:So what do you think about being yet another blonde on the show?

AB:I was actually shocked they picked a blonde again. But California is like, 80 percent blondes and 20 percent brunettes. I’m actually a natural brunette. So if I make it to a season six, I might become a brunette again.


Slide Show:

Real Housewives of Orange County: Tamra Barney, Eddie Judge (Torres)

Tamra Barney has announced that she and Eddie Judge are thinking about more than the next time they jump in the tub.  According to The Real Housewives Of Orange County star, the couple are now planning to wed.

                            Woo-hoo!!  I’m marrying a judge… no more speeding tickets for me!  Huh?  Yes, he is a judge… his NAME is Eddie JUDGE, so he IS a judge… Woo-hoo!!

We’ve talked about marriage and we want to get married,’ she told The Daily Mail. The recently separated housewife said she believes that Eddie was her soul-mate.  ‘It’s an insane amount of love; I have never said term ‘soul mate’ before, but we are!’  ‘We finish each other’s sentences… I’m not the easiest person in the world and he gets me, nor does he judge. He simply says, “that’s my girl.”‘

                                                                          Tamra, what does Eddie really do… for real??   He’s a judge.  No, Tamra… really, what does Eddie do??   He’s a judge.  Tamra… for real now… what does Eddie… oh, nevermind…

The 42-year-old said that the only thing stopping the couple from tying the knot right away is her four children, which she shares with her ex-husband Simon Barney.

‘Within the next year we’ll be married,’ she said.  ‘It’s all about timing right now and the kids play a huge part.  ‘If it weren’t for the kids, we’d be married right now… but we’re happy as can be; it’s happily ever after!’

 Esscuz me… uh Tamra… listen carefully:  If Eddie were a real judge, he would know that filming scenes with you naked in a bathtub would give Simon evidence against you in family court.   Eddie, tell them you’re a judge… come on Eddie, tell them…

The reality star gushed about her hunky new man, who she says is ‘one of the best things that’s ever happened in my life’.  ‘He’s understanding, he’s caring and he just really has a big heart.’  She said that having more children will also play a big part in their future.

‘Eddie is adopted and said he’d even like to adopt,’ she said.

NOTE:  Maybe Eddie doesn’t understand what the definition of ‘adopted’ is because his own sister tells a different story about his ‘adoption':

According to Eddie Judge’s sister, Shalimar Torres, Eddie Judge is originally from Mexico.   Eddie arrived in America at a young age after Eddie’s mother took off from her family in Mexico, taking Eddie with her.

“When Eddie was a teenager he met this man who gave him odd side jobs and he eventually took Eddie in and became his foster dad,”  Shalimar disclosed.  “That’s when he changed his last name to Judge.

Eddie’s sister also made the following claims about Tamra’s relationship with Eddie, including how Bravo inadvertently initiated the relationship between Tamra and Eddie.

How did Tamra and Eddie meet?

Shalimar says it was originally staged by the Bravo production team of Real Housewives of Orange County.   “When everyone was having a hard time because of the economy the show wanted to make it look like Tamra was trying to downsize so they met through her realtor,”  Shalimar said. “They came and asked if they could use our house to make it look like Tamra was interested in buying it.

                                          Now Tamra… you have pretend that you like this guy so that we can film his house… Oh!  You really do like him?  Sweet!!

The Bravo production company would have to had permission from the home owner and the realty company to film Tamra viewing the house.  According to Shalimar, “they” was the Bravo production company.

“Soon Tamra started coming over to have lunch with Eddie and then they pretty much started dating. When she met my brother she was still married,” Shalimar concluded.

Real Housewives of Miami… Recap

Venue | Marzo - Abril 2011Screw William Levy… this is my magazine and I go front and center on the cover…

How could it be that this episode of the Real Housewives of Miami is #5 and the finale is next week?  Well, it is and just a note:  there was NO sighting of Elaine Lancaster this week…elaine1b Summer Splash Wednesdays at PlungeElaine, you got robbed.    On to the recap:

Marysol and Phillipe got married on an Aspen mountaintop.  Marysol PattonThey look so cute together… I didn’t realize until I looked up his mug shot that Phillipe is 6′ 5″… Yo, Marysol… let’s get married…

The justice of the peace read the wedding vows they wrote for each other… and back at home in Miami, Phillipe surprises Marysol by installing his ‘wine cellar’ in Marysol’s apartment, which Marysol isn’t too happy about.

A wine refrigerator, Phillipe…

William Levy stops by Alexia’s magazine for his second feature in and cover on her magazine and she just looooves William Levy.  Understandable, Alexia, understandable… Herman or William… your infatuation with WL is totally understandable.

Venue | Julio - Agosto 2010 Hey… got the cover again… I’m much prettier than the owner-chick…

Larsa stops by her favorite restaurant with her friend Tara to speak with the chef at Martarano’s to arrange a cooking lesson with owner Steve Martarano… a brute with a whisk and knife skills… sexy!  At least Larsa thinks so…

I can whip yo azz, whip you into shape or whip up a souffle… take your pick.

Alexia is in a car wreck on the way to the fashion show and calls Crispy Rice to let her know that she won’t be able to model, so Crispy takes over Alexia’s modeling job.

Alexia Gets Into a Car AccidentHmm… Alexia walked away from this in one piece… come on, she could’ve made her modeling gig…

Crispy let’s everyone know that Alexia’s clothes don’t fit her properly because Alexia is bigger than she is… slap!  Crispy always give backhanded compliments or outright digs at her fellow housewives… what a biatch.

E18158standAlexia would never fit her huge-ness into my ‘meet my kids’ teachers’ outfit…

After the cooking lesson with chef Steve, everyone begins to dine on their creations. Marysol passes around her wedding photo and then Adriana mentions Crispy’s slow payment for attending the Mayor of Miami’s annual gala… really, Adriana… why?  It’s just too boring to rehash this again…

An Upset Christy Looking at AdrianaCrispy givin’ Adriana the death stare…

Marysol Is NOTE:  Is Kim Zolciak aware that Marysol knows Kim’s Miami host, Thomas Kramer… or does he just pose for photos with everyone?   Yeah, he poses with everyone… just like Shana/Taylor.

Andy and Elsa… Too Sweet

Elsa Carreras finally got to the the Bravo clubhouse after her two-day car ride from Miami to New York and sat right next to Andy, which is the best seat in the clubhouse… and the sparks flew!  Oh yeah, Elsa’s daughter, Marysol from the Real Housewives of Miami was there, too, but Andy hardly knew it… he was so taken with Elsa…

PART II…Here is when Andy falls in love with Elsa right on TV!…

Real Housewives of Miami: Marysol Patton… Andy’s “Elsa” Worship…

Andy Cohen, beloved grand poo-bah of all things Bravo and Housewives related, has gone to extremes in showing his infatutation with the engaging Elsa Carrera Patton, mother of Marysol Patton of Real Housewives of Miami.

This way to the clubhouse, Elsa… my adorable angel and sweetheart from the sunshine state…

Andy is so totally enamored of Elsa that he has posted signage on New York City’s various modes of transportation just for Elsa’s visit to his lil clubhouse tonight.  As Elsa dramatized in the last episode of RHOM, she is so afraid of flying that it takes her at least two weeks to prepare for a flight…

As soon as Andy heard the news that there would be an empty seat next to his at the Bravo clubhouse, he took immediate action to make sure his enchanting Elsa would be with him… Andy dispatched a couple of his minions to go to Miami and drive adorable Elsa and her daughter that she had to drag along, Marysol, to New York.  They should arrive in time for Andy to gaze into Elsa’s eyes and totally forget that he’s on TV and has a show to do…  we’ll be watching you, Andy!
Andy spares no expense when it comes to making sure Elsa is greeted as soon as her car hits the streets of Manhattan… now that’s luv…

(Thanks to SH reader “AL”!!!…)

Texans Are Protesting…

From CultureMap:

“It’s bad news for Houston socialites and reality show addicts alike.  Andy Cohen, Bravo’s president of original programming and development, is saying that Miami will be the last city with a Real Housewives franchise, telling OK! Magazine, “I really feel like we’re done.”

Kim is all the big-haired woman we can stand at Bravo…

Of course that might not stop the cameras rolling in Houston.   Two rival casts started to form with different producers in last  summer, although we haven’t heard of any filming. Both projects — one from Austin producer Ashley Chiles and another by Ron Muccianti from Los Angeles, are positioning themselves as possibilities to get picked up by Bravo’s copyrighted franchise.  (hint:  all the other HWs had audition tapes… maybe you should film something if you want to be plinked by Andy’s wand… like how do they not know this?)

Cohen has hedged from his original comments, telling The New York Post, “We’re pleased with the number of cities and locations we currently have.”

bravoAnother Maker’s Mark to toast Miami, the final franchise of Real Housewives… but a guy can always change his mind…

But surely Bravo can do better than to end on the lackluster Miami, which only earned the Housewives seal of approval after the fourth season of The Real Housewives of New York was temporarily shelved for being too boring.   (Just imagine how profoundly boring RHONY was for Andy to shove the boring Miami on us Housewives devotees!)

You Houstonites are so delusional…

With the disastrous Washington D.C. cast unofficially scrapped, there should be room for a Texas version.  And with lunatic Danielle fired and all the women on The Real Housewives of New Jersey going broke, how long can that franchise really last?     The Internet seems to have some buzz about a potential Real Housewives of Dallas(… it’s more like a ‘light flutter’ than a ‘buzz’…) and there are reports of a Real Housewives-like casting call in San Francisco (which proved to be phoney).   But we hope Cohen reconsiders his ban on Housewives expansion.

After all, if you are looking for blinged-out, dramatic, positively ridiculous women, Texas girls can bring it like the best of them — just with bigger hair…



Real Housewives of New Jersey: Somebody Alert Andy… Phony New Jersey Housewife and it Ain’t KimG!

Well, isn’t this something!

Isn’t it considered a felony crime to describe oneself as an ‘upcoming Real Housewives of New Jersey star’ without kissing Andy Cohen’s ring and receiving his blessing first?

                                                              Uh, it explicitly says right here in your contract, that you signed, Taylor, that you must kiss my ring before your show airs.  I only let you slide this long ’cause your mouth is so huge I thought I’d just have an elbow left…

This blurb was on a local Louisville KY site:  “Playboy centerfold and upcoming “Real Housewives of New Jersey” star Annika Bruggeworth will attend Saturday night’s shindig with her husband, Dr. Scott Bruggeworth.”

Here’s what… this ‘upcoming’ self-proclaimed ‘star’ of RHONJ is an attention diva and her husband is a dentist.

So, the following scenario probably takes place during the next season of Real Housewives of New Jersey on a “very special episode” of RHONJ

“Albie made all by himself a yummy surprise for his mommy... her favorite chocolate walnut cheesecake, which took him two days to make ’cause he was studying hard for a place in next year’s law class at Phoenix University of Online Law.   Albie knows that as a lawyer, he must understand and follow the letter of the law and he applied that understanding to the cheesecake recipe.  The recipe said to grind walnuts for the bottom crust and since the recipe assumed that everyone knows to not use the shell, that was not fully explained in the recipe and, of course, Albie ground the walnuts for the cheesecake crust, shell and all.

                                                Albie, you idiot… look what you did to Tree and lil Milania… make sure you wrap the rest of that rock-riddled cheesecake for Juicy…

“All the Manzos and Joo-dices are seated in their giant king and queen diningroom chairs, fully sated from the meal they just devoured when Albie enters with his masterpiece chocolate walnut cheesecake… it’s especially special ’cause even Chris can see that Albie didn’t swipe it from the Brownstone.  All the ooohs and aaaahs are over and before Jackie can get a forkful, Tree and little Milania have already attacked the cheesecake and began screaming.

“Forks drop and everyone covers their ears from the eerie sounds coming from little Milania amplified by Tree’s shreaking.  Little bits of white tooth chips are landing on their dessert plates and blood is dripping from their lips.  Caroline has seen this before (when Lauren beat the hell out of Christopher and Albie ’cause they told her she would never be flight attendant…) and knew a dentist was needed.  Big Albie and Caroline whisk them off to the nearest dentist, (Juicy wasn’t there… he had to attend an ‘important meeting’ at the apartment over the pizza shop) which is the above-named ‘upcoming star’ of RHONJ‘s husband.   As they rush into the dentist’s office, they are met by the ‘upcoming star’… her screen time lasts for five seconds.”

                                                Danielle warned about havin’ a non-Manzo on the show… losing teeth won’t make ME quit…

And that is why this particular fame-seeking wife of a dentist thinks she is the next ‘upcoming star’ of RHONJ… try as she may, poor thing will never be another Kim G.

                                                Yo, dental assistant… keep your drill and suction equipment out of Franklin Lakes… this is MY town, honey.  Got it???


RHOOC… Makes More Sense Now

Hindsight is 20/20, bringing the past into sharper focus.  For instance… in looking back to December 2010, SH posted the following about the upcoming season of the Real Housewives of Orange County:

Now that RHOOC has aired, the information included about Eddie Judge and Tamra dovetails with last night’s episode and in general makes more sense about the all the players mentioned in the post… Peggy Tanous, Fernanda Rocha…

Hold still, Tamra… I’m injecting a special botox swirl, ‘braintox’… your brain cells will increase, but your head is somewhat barren, so you will need to come back every day to notice any difference…

Even more illuminating is the site written about Vicki by her first ex-husband:    This site was revived by the comment submitted just today on the December 2010 post above.  How interesting… the best way for something to go away is to ignore it, not acknowledge it by commenting… or was that the commenters’ intent….Hmmm….

Term insurance is not the best and if you don’t have a check to go along with that new client, get the hell out of my office… I’m WORKING!!!