Lynne Curtin… Fashion (Non)Sense

Ex-cast member of the Real Housewives of Orange County and first full-fledged, founding and only member (thus far) of the Stoopid Housewives Club, Lynne Curtin, has finally updated her jewelry and bedding site (  Until recently, Ms. Curtin was only taking pre-orders for her uniquely visionary jewelry line via her site…

Lynne’s jewelry line was being sold at Fred Segel Boutique and Demi Things and probably some other places…  However, Fred Segel is no longer carrying her jewelry line and Demi-Things’ website is down and their last twitter and facebook entries were in July, 2010: site:

Lynne CurtinLynne CurtinLynne Curtin‘Love Chains’  $148

So, what’s a girl to do when she has her cuff line ready to go and her LA-area retailers have let her down?  You promote the hell out of your expanded line… in addition to cuffs, Lynne also offers earrings, necklaces, handbags and bedding!  Lynne will gift one of her Wonder Woman-inspired cuffs with each order of Lynne Curtin bedding: (


The Raquel Collection $289

(Free Cuff!!!)

Also, you go to the people to sell your slew of treasures, you don’t wait for the people to come to you… the people who want to buy your quaintly bizarre junk bangles, gems and frippery.  So, where in the world will Lynne go to sell her wearable doodads objets d’art??  Logically, the locale would be somewhere in California (LA, San Fran, San Diego)/Nevada (Las Vegas, of course)/Arizona (pick a place)… however, Ms. Curtin does not possess that part of her brain which knows the meaning of the word ‘logic’ or ‘logical’ (one of the reasons she is the founding member of the SHC)…

‘Fringe’  $595,  ‘Mini-Fringe’ $325

Lynne will be appearing on March 12, 2011 at Sophistikate in…. wait for it… Bethlehem, PA.  HUH???  Yes, Lynne will be there at 12 and 3 pm only… and if you want to purchase items from Lynne, you will also need to purchase a ticket to do so:

12:00 PM Appearance/ Cocktail & SOPHISTIKATE Tank TopMore Info $35.00 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
3:00 PM Appearance/ Cocktail & Lynne Curtin Cuff More Info $150.00 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
3:00 PM Appearance/ Cocktail and Lynne Curtin Earring More Info $85.00 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
1. What do I want to do on Saturday March 12, 2011?

a) Meet a Super Hot Celeb, a.k.a. Orange County Housewife, Lynne Curtin
b) Have a delicious Emperors Brand Martini or glass of yummy Voga Moscato wine
c) Shop some amazing cuffs, earrings, and accessories
d) Be seen
e) All of the above …

It’s a free country and I wish Lynne and her jewelry line much success…  and if that’s what it takes for Lynne to make a success of her business, then she should puddle jump all over the US and Canada, selling tickets to see her and to sell the hell out of her various goods.

There’s just one teeny, tiny little bit of information that is posted on her promotional content that I needed further explanation, so I gave Sophistikate in Bethlehem, PA a call. In Ms. Curtin’s promo, it states that she is being sponsored by various local businesses and ‘the Real Housewives of Orange County.’  The very nice person I spoke with at Sophistikate was unaware that Ms. Curtin was no longer appearing on Bravo as an Orange County Housewife, but she would bring this to the attention of Sophistikate’s owner.  I told her that I would give her a call back next week to find out what Sophistikate’s owner had to say…

Lynne will never lose her ‘association’ with RHOOC, but how did she go about being ‘sponsored’ by them for her PA appearance?

Lynne’s before and after facelift photos… just for the hell of it…

It’s too bad that DemiThings went bust… they had a cute video promoting Lynne’s line:

8 comments on “Lynne Curtin… Fashion (Non)Sense

    • kac: Thanks for commenting! If you notice, the company… Branded Home Products… that Lynne chose to have her bedding produced will produce a bedding line for anyone ( Anyway, Lynne’s bedding has a 300-thread count v Jillzarin’s 220-thread count, which explains the slightly higher price for Ms. Curtin’s sheets. They are both in the ‘cheap’ category… quality and price wise. And in answer to your inquiry: ‘what’s with the broads and bedding?’… don’t guys like nice, clean, coordinated bedding, too?? SH


  1. ToMS.SH, My question is, why did Bravo give her the boot? At least she showed up on The Fashion Show…”My Darlings, gather around”. He didn’t use that line on Top Chef Allstars. Granted, Angelo’s egg yolk in plastic wrap looked bad, and “Crocodile” wrote on the table looked “Kind of Charles Manson”, he didn’t say that Isiach Maretti’s was his favorite designer,(Ben Weiners uncle), that’s why he didn’t win the quick fire…and yes, I know I spelled his name wrong. His clothes on HSN look like stuff my greatgrandmother would wear.


  2. So the Raquel Collection was inspired by the trampy daughter on “The Dirty” video on the internet. You’d have thought it would be stars…I know they could never get the “Hello Kitty” people to sign off on that.


    • cc/mc: Lynne is someone who has had highs and lows, but never learns from her lows, or her highs, or anything for that matter… she’s as stupid as a load of oats. She and her husband keep trying to protect that flimsy shell that they live in, because if it cracks everyone will see what posers they are. You would think that when it cracked that they would go about their lives differently (learn from their mistakes) and move on, but they patch up the crack and try again to live exactly the same as before… and then the shell cracks again, only deeper… and what do they do? Learn from their second mistake, make some changes and attempt to live differently? Noooooo… they pretend that they didn’t see the crack, sweep up the fragments, patch up the crack and keep their same lives going. Some would say that is a description of insanity and maybe that’s their problem… they’re just insane… but IMO, they are STOOPID. You can get info by checking their names on the masthead: and then read what the local OC newspaper has to say about them: Lynne is the epitome of stoopid-ity (hey, that rhymes!)… nothing gets through to her… and that is why she is the numero uno Stoopid Housewife and remains as the embodiment to which all others in the running for the next Stoopid Housewife aspire. SH


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