Oprah v The Housewives

Oprah, queen of her own delusional mind…

Oprah Winfrey appears on the cover of Parade Magazine in a huge red tent and in a pose that makes her look bigger than she is.   Her cover also reminds us that OWN – the Oprah Winfrey Network – is coming in just a few days and will air 24/7.

And what kind of programming does she want?

None of that Real Housewives crap… (Oprah better watch what she’s saying because the Manzo’s got friends and as soon as Treetrunk Joo-dice gets over her little money issue… well, if she can spontaneously sit Andy Cohen down with a fingerflick, just imagine what Tree could do when she has a mission!)

“I think so much of television is a minefield (except her show, of course) that just zaps your energy, wastes your time,” Oprah told Parade in an interview for their December 26 issue.

“I happened to be on the treadmill one night (can you prove that, Oprah?) and passed one of the ‘[Real] Housewives’ shows—I don’t know which city—and literally my mouth was open ‘cause I thought, ‘This is on television?’ (Spoken by the person who handed out free cars (but handed tax invoices with them), brought us Rielle Hunter, Kirstie Alley’s body stocking, James Frey getting whipped, the ‘Secret’, Eckhard Tolle, Dr. Phil, Carson Kressley’s makeovers, Nate Berkus, Suzanne Somers, and all her Scientology friends.)

“I recognize that there’s a whole group of people who find that very entertaining I wonder for how long. I think that there are people who want to be fed just a little more.” (Oh, Oprah, you been ‘feeding’ us too much.  Now go away.)

Note to Oprah: You chose to trash ‘Housewives’ thereby alienating more viewers and making your already sinking ratings sink lower.  I, for one, will be smugly satisfied when you get clobbered in the ratings by ‘Housewives.’


Oprah before photo, just for the hell of it: